


A Royal Affair

by Hakimu



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Cheating, Drama, F/M, basically soap opera level drama because i can't be stopped, fluff which becomes angst, lots of angst from our fave angsty boy, text will become suggestive but not explicit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-01
Updated: 2019-10-19
Packaged: 2020-11-16 14:23:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20839847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hakimu/pseuds/Hakimu
Summary: Three years after the Blue Lions win the war, Byleth and Dimitri are mostly happily married and living in Fhirdiad as Archbishop and King, respectively. Things change completely when a letter from Claude leads to a class reunion party where unwise choices are made - choices that have the potential to ruin marriages, lives, and the alliance between two neighboring kingdoms.--A very angsty story about love and betrayal, because why not.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Prince's Mistress](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4141215) by [sarai377](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarai377/pseuds/sarai377). 

Byleth stood atop her bedroom’s balcony which overlooked the capital of Fhirdiad as the sun slowly disappeared beneath the horizon. The city was captivating in the evening. It was only three years ago that the city was on the brink of destruction at the hands of Cornelia and her sinister allies. Byleth, Dimitri, and the Blue Lions painstakingly fought - with everything at stake - for a chance at peace. And now, with that goal achieved, Byleth relished in the sight of sleepy Fhirdiad. She could see the few shops that were still open at this hour preparing to close, so that the hardworking owners could at last return home to their families. She appreciated small moments like this the most; they made the war and the sacrifices worth it. They showed her the finer details of the world that she and her husband worked so hard to help build.

As the sun vanished, the chill of night forced Byleth back inside. The simple robe she was wearing was not enough to provide the warmth she needed.

After the defeat of the Empire, Lady Rhea officially named Byleth as her successor to the Church of Seiros, shocking many that had assumed Seteth would be her successor. This appointment was ill-timed, however, as it came only days before Prince Dimitri and Byleth were to officially announce their engagement. Eventually it was decided that Seteth and Byleth would jointly lead the Church, with Seteth overseeing Garreg Mach and Byleth overseeing from the Kingdom’s capital with her fiancé, Dimitri. The two soon married and began working on rebuilding the war-torn Fodlan that was ravaged by Edelgard’s failed revolution. 

Byleth entered the bedroom and slid back into the bed that was still occupied by her husband. The couple had finished their duties earlier than usual and were able to enjoy a rare evening alone together. There were many days when their duties left them unable to even see each other. Thus, the evenings in which they were able to enjoy physical and emotional intimacy were treasured.

Dimitri stirred upon feeling Byleth’s warmth behind him. “Back so soon, Beloved?” he asked softly.

“The night’s chill was too much for me.”

“Oh?” He rolled over, lifting himself up so that he was above Byleth. He used his arms to playfully pin Byleth down onto the bed by her arms. “Do you need me to warm you up?” She knew him well enough to recognize the desire gleaming in his eye as he looked down at her.

“Mmm, yes, I think I’d like that very much,” she purred back.

\--

There was no trace of Dimitri when Byleth awoke the next morning. This was not unusual. Dimitri preferred to begin work and retire early, whereas Byleth liked to sleep in and work through the evening. Their conflicting schedules were a large part of the reason why they struggled to spend time together.

When Byleth finally found him, he was in his study reading through a plethora of royal documents. Much like his father, Dimitri was a benevolent ruler that placed the well-being of his subjects as his top priority. Byleth loved him for his kind heart, but sometimes she wished Dimitri devoted more time to her. Not that she could be too hard on him; oftentimes she too was kept busy with official Church business as well. Things weren’t so bad currently, but in the early days of their marriage Byleth had to travel often to help quell the many rebellions that popped up across the country from Edelgard sympathizers and/or Imperial loyalists.

“Good morning,” she told him pleasantly.

He didn’t return her greeting, instead lifting his arm to hand her a sheet of parchment. “I think you should read this,” he said.

Byleth inspected the faded parchment that was stamped with a foreign insignia. “What is it?”

“A letter from an old friend of ours.”

At that, Byleth perked up. Her heavy workload didn’t just affect her and Dimitri’s relationship; she had trouble keeping in contact with many of the friends she had made at Garreg Mach. In fact, Seteth and Flayn were the only people not living in the palace that Byleth kept in regular contact with. Most of this contact was business related, so it didn’t truly count. She opened the letter, skipping over the text to read the signature. The letter was from Claude!

Byleth hadn’t seen Claude since the day the Blue Lions rescued him from an Imperial invasion years ago. That day, he handed over control of his territories to Dimitri and ran off to Almyra. Dimitri and Claude were friends during their days as students at Garreg Mach; Byleth could remember the two of them eating and studying together often despite being rival house leaders. Even so, Claude did not attend the couple’s wedding, and the pair often wondered what became of him.

Byleth’s eyes flicked back up to read the letter in full.

_Dimitri,_

_How’s it going, Your Majesty? I hope you still remember me! I hope you have been doing well. I’ve been very busy over here in Almyra for the past couple of years. It’s kind of a long story, but I’m the King here now. Crazy, right? Now that I finally have Almyra running smoothly, I think the time has come for me to visit my old friend and Teach! I’d like to discuss the prospect of an alliance between our countries, and, of course, visit my dear friends! I think we are due for a class reunion, right?_

_I look forward to hearing back from you. I’d like to make arrangements to visit within the next month or two, if that works for your lordliness._

_Your friend,  
Claude_

“King of Almyra, huh? Did you see that coming?” she asked her husband incredulously. 

“Absolutely not. Claude was always one for secrets. He was always hiding behind his jokes, as I am sure you remember.”

Byleth looked at the letter again, amused. Seeing him refer to her as “Teach” brought back memories of the good old days. The days before the war that changed all their lives completely. She held the letter close to her heart. Reading it made her realize how much she missed her students at Garreg Mach, including the ones that weren’t in her house. And, she thought sadly, including the ones that did not survive the war.

“I think a class reunion sounds nice."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are about to get spicy! I am sorry for what is about to happen.


	2. A Second Choice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Blue Lions, with the addition of Hilda and Claude, have their class reunion. As the night goes on, Claude finds Byleth alone and has some questions for her.

Seeing her students gather together at the palace made Byleth jarringly aware of how much time had passed, and how much she regretted not keeping in better contact with her students. As she watched them chat amongst each other, Byleth felt a sense of loss overcome her despite the fact that everyone was here with her.

She felt a gloved hand, unmistakably belonging to her husband, rest on her shoulder as she stood at the railings of the palace interior, looking down upon the students that had gathered. She had thought organizing this get-together would be stressful, but the last three weeks had been relatively easy thanks to the help she received from Hilda. 

When the invitations were sent out to everyone, Hilda immediately traveled to the palace (without informing anyone) and appointed herself as the official party planner. The royal couple was taken aback by the sudden gesture. With everything she did, however, Dimitri and Byleth were happy to host her, even though she was not technically a Blue Lion.

"Why not join them?" Dimitri asked her. Byleth turned to face her husband with a sly grin. Dimitri had made an attempt to slick back his messy blonde hair, and he looked ruggedly handsome, even in his evening attire.

"I could ask you the same question."

"I was on my way down, but then I saw how lovely you looked and got distracted," he responded. Byleth had opted for a simple black gown for the night with minimal jewelry. She didn't want to attract unnecessary attention to herself, as the evening was supposed to be for everyone. Although, she did not consider Dimitri's attention to her unnecessary.

Byleth lifted her hand to his face and leaned into him for a quick kiss. She held his gaze for a moment and smiled warmly at him. "We can't have our King getting distracted, can we? Let's go, together." 

Hand in hand, the pair walked down to greet their former comrades. 

\--

After speaking with her students and catching up with them, Byleth took a moment to step away from everyone and thank Sothis for looking after her students. She was beyond thankful that they were all here, healthy and happy, and able to share this evening with her. 

She credited the fact that all her Blue Lions were still alive to divine intervention. Specifically, _her_ divine intervention. Though she mostly relied on her tactical prowess to achieve her many victories, there had been the occasional moment where she used Sothis' now-dormant power to save the lives of her precious pupils. She remembers her first death vividly; to this day she still has nightmares about it. On their third mission as a class, Felix got too cocky and took on a group of axe-wielding bandits. A fateful misstep lead to an axe slicing him clean open. The sound of Ingrid's screams being warped by the backwards flow of time stills haunts Byleth to this day. She hated every time she was forced to use that power. Now, she was grateful that she longer had it within her to wield it.

Byleth cast the dark thoughts aside and allowed the happiness she felt earlier to work its way into her heart again. She felt pride swell within her chest as she listed to the noisy chatter of her students catching up with each other. She was so proud of them. All of them. They all had worked so hard as her students and as her comrades to get to where they now stood.

Felix became a master swordsman and the lord of Fraldarius territory after the war ended. He and Dimitri still continue to butt heads, but their relationship has improved greatly from what it had been during the war. Despite Felix’s rough demeanor, the reports she and Dimitri have received in the past years have suggested that his subjected greatly respected him as their lord.

Sylvain had taken to ruling his territory as well, growing quite close to Felix in the process. He has gotten better about his skirt chasing from what Byleth has heard, but she will believe that when she sees it. 

Annette and Ashe had gotten married, of which Byleth was aware, but she was excited to learn that they were now expecting a child. It seemed the child would be born any day now, and the couple was absolutely beaming about the prospect of becoming parents. It was very endearing to see.

Mercedes, to nobody's surprise, has devoted most of her time to the orphanage she opened in Fhirdiad for children who lost their parents in the war. Dimitri was most pleased to hear the status of her efforts, as he made sure to provide her with ample funding every year.

The other two Blue Lions, Ingrid and Dedue, were present as well. However, Byleth was already caught up with their lives as both of them worked inside of the palace. Ingrid served as a knight under Dimitri and Dedue retained his post as Dimitri's retainer. As such, Byleth was able to speak with these two more due to their closeness with her husband. Dimitri relieved them of the duties for the evening so that they could take their places at the class reunion. Ingrid seemed especially grateful for this, as she was eager to reunite with her childhood friends Felix and Sylvain. Byleth smiled as she watched Dimitri, Ingrid, Felix, and Sylvian talk with each other. It truly felt like old times.

The only student not attending was Dorothea. Dorothea was the only survivor from the Black Eagle house, and only survived the war because she had asked to transfer to the Blue Lions months before the war began. She had confided in Byleth that she felt uncomfortable being the only commoner in that house. The poor girl had felt bad about leaving her house, but ultimately, the act saved her life. The war had a great impact on Dorothea’s mental state. The girl often said that she wished she had died alongside her old classmates, so she didn’t have to live with the guilt of surviving. Byleth recieved a letter from her a few days ago saying she feared seeing her Blue Lions classmates would trigger unpleasant memories from darker days. Byleth couldn’t blame her for not attending. 

Byleth snapped from her thoughts at the sound of heels clacking on the floor. Hilda approached cautiously, weaving her fingers through her pink hair. While not truly member of the Blue Lions, she worked so hard planning this party that Byleth had made sure she was treated as an honorary Blue Lion by the others. "Heya, Professor," she began. “Where is Claude? I RISKED my life for that man, and he doesn't even have the decency to write me a letter! And now he has the nerve to show up late? I mean, HONESTLY. He is going to get an earful from me when I see him!"

Byleth smiled and nodded in agreement. Claude sure had a lot of explaining to do.

\--

The sun fully set when the illustrious Claude von Riegan decided to make his grand entrance. And grand it was. He arrived on a wyvern so white it appeared to be glowing in the moonlight. He had at least thirty fellow riders, all dressed in full Almyran armor, accompanying him.  
As he approached the group, Byleth could tell he had not changed a bit. He still wore the same golden armor with his signature yellow cape and multi-colored sash. His hair was still thick and slightly messy; his beard was unchanged as well. And, of course, he still wore an expression of regality with a mischevious gleam in his eyes. He may now be the king of a foreign land, but he was still Claude von Riegan.

“Claude, you know it’s rude to bring your battalion to a party, right?” Hilda shrieked at him as her climbed off of his wyvern. The pink bombshell marched right up to him.

Claude touched down and threw up his arms in the air. “It’s so nice to see you too, Hilda,” he replied sarcastically, wrapping her in a hug.

“It’s about time you came back to Fodlan,” she said, returning the embrace. "But would it kill you to write to us sometime?" She led him over to where the Blue Lions were waiting, eager to be reunited with their old friend. Claude made his way through the group, hugging and smiling at everyone, until he found himself in front of Byleth and Dimitri.

“Your Majesty, I hope my battalion doesn’t offend you,” he said to Dimitri, casting an amused glance at Hilda.

Dimitri laughed. “Not at all, my friend. And based on your letter, it seems your battalion is necessary, seeing as you are the King of Alymra?” Dimitri half-said, half-asked.

Claude gasped and placed his hand over his heart. “Your Majesty, I have only just arrived, and already you are pressuring me to divulge all of my secrets!”

Claude stepped aside to stand in front of Byleth and grabbed her hand. “And Teach, you look just lovely as I remember,” he said, placing a reverent kiss on her hand. Claude looked back to Dimitri. “You two look happy. It pleases me to see my friends in good health.”

“That’s nice,” said Hilda, “but you’ve kept us all waiting, Claude. We decided to wait for you before we began dinner. Now that you are here…” Hilda trailed off as she gestured to the dining area.

“Well then, sorry for my fashionably late entrance,” the King of Almyra replied.

“You can apologize by divulging your royal secrets,” Dimitri said to him with a playful push on the arm. “Come on Claude, you’d be dying to know if you were us.”

“Ah, that’s true! Sadly, I don’t think the tale is as interesting as you are all making it out to be.”

\--

Throughout the dinner, Claude kept everyone entertained as he explained his half-Alymran, half-Fodlan heritage to his friends. While that wasn’t exactly a secret, what was surprising was the fact that Claude’s father had been the previous King of Almyra, and Claude hid the fact he was the crown prince the entire time he was at Garreg Mach. Not even Hilda, his closet friend, knew this.

Claude even told everyone some stories from his childhood, shedding some light on the Almyran tradition of raising all children as equals, regardless of blood status. Royals, nobles, and commoners all had the same upbringing in Almyra.

“So, Claude, you aren’t going to tell us about how you came to Fodlan and became recognized as the heir of a prestigious noble house?” asked Mercedes. Disappointment was evident in her voice.

“Ah, I am afraid that is a story for another class reunion. A reunion in the distant future from now,” Claude replied with a wink.

“Claude! You are impossible,” Annette whined.

“Sorry,” he said. “I’ve gotta keep some mysteries about me. How else would I pique everyone’s interest?”

Byleth chuckled and looked at Dimitri. He returned her glance with a smile and an affectionate stroke of her arm. “Thank you, Claude, for sharing your story with us,” Dimitri replied. “I look forward to the next reunion, when we can hear the next chapter. I pray it does not disappoint.”

Claude winked at Dimitri. “I would never dream of disappointing his Majesty.”

\--

As the evening progressed, music played and wine flowed as the students enjoyed each other’s company. The dance floor was lively, with dance partners frequently being swapped around.

As the hours wore on, and Byleth danced more than she though physically possible, she snuck away to the courtyard for a breath of fresh air. Dimitri had retired and bade her good night moments earlier, but she did not feel ready to join him yet. She sat on a bench and enjoyed a moment of repose.

Byleth looked up at the glistening stars. Based on the moon’s position, she guessed that it was now early morning. Most of the students had left to return home or retire to a guest room in the palace. Dimitri was adamant that all of his friends stay the night and return home the next morning, but this was not possible for everyone. Felix had decided to return home to his territory early, and Mercedes needed to be at the orphanage as soon as possible. Sylvain was supposed to return to his territory with Felix, but, in true Sylvain nature, he remained on the dance floor with Ingrid, with whom he had spent a lot of the evening with. Most of the others had taken Dimitri up on his offer and retired in the palace or remained nearby to enjoy the last remnants of the festivities.

“You know, none of those stars shine as bright as you, Teach.” Claude slid next to her on the bench.

“And here I thought I snuck away without being seen.”

“You should know by now that nothing evades me.” He winked at her and flashed her a smile. She knew Claude well enough to know his smile was not genuine.

“You followed me for a reason, I assume. Care to tell me what it is?”

Claude looked away and paused for a moment. “There is something I want to talk to you about.” There was no hint of a joke in his voice; his tone was sincere. Very surprising, as Claude had been jovial all throughout the night.

“I’m here,” Byleth reaffirmed. “I’ll listen.”

“I was hoping we could go somewhere private,” Claude responded. He arched an eyebrow at her in anticipation of her reaction.

The request caught her by surprise. However, due to the sincerity in his voice, Byleth figured it was something serious. “Um, I guess we can go to my study. Follow me.” She gestured her head towards the palace wing opposite of where the party was happening. “We won’t be bothered there.”

Upon arriving, Byleth shut the door gently as she gestured for Claude to sit upon one of her couches. When he did so, she sat down next to him. “Well? What’s on your mind?”

He waited a moment before speaking slowly, obviously choosing his words carefully. “You know, Teach, sometimes I wonder what things would be like if you had chosen me all those years ago.”

“What do you mean?” she asked, even though she knew the answer.

“I mean what things would be like if you chose to teach the Golden Deer. How differently things would have turned out for us. For _them_.”

Those last words tore through Byleth’s heart. She would be lying if she said she never regretted choosing the Blue Lions. With everything that happened with the war, she often wondered if another decision could have saved more lives.

Painfully, she remembered all those they had lost. Every student in the Black Eagle house, except for Dorothea, had stayed true to the Empire. All died during the war; many of them fell by Byleth’s hand.

The Golden Deer house had suffered heavy losses as well. Leonie, Ignatz, and Raphael perished in the battle of Gronder Field. Their bodies were found only after the battle had been won, and it had been too late to save them. Lysithea survived the war but passed away shortly after from a mysterious illness. Lorenz defected to the empire and was killed in battle, by Byleth’s own hand, nonetheless. Marianne had vanished after the battle of Garreg Mach, and to this day nobody knows what became of her.

Tears filled Byleth’s eyes as she remembered their faces. They didn’t have to die. Things were different back then. Dimitri wasn’t right, he didn’t know what he was doing, he gave orders he never would have normally…

“Do you think we could have saved them?” she asked Claude, trying very hard to keep her emotions contained. She was on the verge of breaking down and the lump in her throat made it hard to speak.

An unreadable expression cast over Claude’s face, and he broke eye contact with Byleth, looking down at the floor. “I think about them every day. Every soldier I command, I look at them and see my fallen classmates.” He closed his eyes. Byleth could no longer hold back the tears burning in her eyes and let them fall freely down her face. “In every knight, I see Leonie. I hear our horses cry and remember the sound hers made when she fell off after receiving that blow. I look to the front lines and see Raphael. I look at my archers and see Ignatz.” He paused and rubbed his eyes. “I’m sorry… I should probably stop reflecting on such sad memories.” He looked Byleth, who was crying, and managed a sad smile. “This is supposed to be a happy night.”

“I’m glad you still honor their memories,” she somehow found the strength to say. She wiped her eyes.

Claude looked at her thoughtfully, wondering if he would regret everything he was about to say. “Teach, that day you saved us from the bandits… I tried everything to gain your support. I wanted you to lead the Golden Deer. We could have been great together. You could have been our savior. I- I am not blaming you for what happened. I would never do that. But when I look out and see all the Blue Lions, all alive and well, that jealousy I once felt during our school days rears its ugly head again.”

Byleth blinked, taken aback by the blunt honestly behind Claude’s words. “Claude, are you saying you were jealous of Dimitri?” She could scarcely believe what she just heard.

“Of course. Edelgard was too. We all wanted you on our side.”

“You saw how much Dimitri struggled after the Battle of Garreg Mach. Without me, he would have destroyed himself. Would have destroyed the Kingdom.”

“What made you choose him?” Claude asked. Byleth held his firm gaze. He was not backing down. Now that he had her here, alone, he was doing everything he could to drag information out of her. He did not care what lines he crossed.

He truly hadn’t changed one bit.

“You’re asking me why I chose his house over yours?” She narrowed her eyes at him. If he wanted to be so direct with her, she’d return the favor.

“Yes. That is exactly what I am asking."

Byleth sighed and folded her hands into her lap. “That day, when I first met you, Dimitri, and Edelgard, I could sense the three of you were important. Before you introduced yourselves as the heirs of your respective territories, I could- I could just tell. I could feel it. And within each of you I sensed pain, the desire for support, and the need for guidance. I felt it within each of you. But within Dimitri, I sensed a true darkness - utter desolation from everything that he had endured. As I spoke with him, I wondered if I could help save him from the brink of destruction. I knew, then, that he needed me the most.”

“By that logic, don’t you think Edelgard needed you the most? She was the one who started the war.”

Byleth shook her head. “Edelgard was a troubled soul. She hid her demons further down than Dimitri ever could, and it brought her to her end. I don’t think I could have saved her, even if I chose her house.”

Byleth looked down at her hands, shocked by the words coming from her mouth. She and Dimitri rarely discussed the war. They had spent their entire marriage rebuilding and moving on from the horrible memories. And while such discussions may have benefitted her, she feared they would trigger Dimitri and cause his mental state to deteriorate. So, she placed the trauma of the war behind her, and the pain subsided as she devoted herself to the future alongside Dimitri. But here and now, with Claude, all the pain Byleth had sworn she had moved on from was bubbling to the surface again, and the pain felt as sharp as it did years ago. She looked up, daring to hear the question she feared Claude would ask next.

Claude did not take his eyes off Byleth. He had already started this conversation, and he wasn’t going to stop until Byleth answered every question that had plagued him for years. “Teach, did you ever think that I needed you? That I could have gone down a dark path of destruction?”

She did not hesitate in her answer. “No, and clearly I was correct. Here you are. You walked your path without me and lead your people to righteousness. And despite your losses, you remained a strong leader to the Golden Deer and now, apparently, to the Almyrans.” Byleth smiled at him. “I know I didn’t choose your house, but Claude, I am so proud of all you have become.

Claude looked at her for a few moments, taking in what he had just heard. Slowly, a smile grew on his face. A true, genuine smile; one that lit up his eyes and his soul. “Teach. Thank you. You have no idea how much it means to me to hear you say that.” Her eyes met his and she lost herself in the powerful, raw emotion Claude was exuding. She almost didn’t hear the words Claude spoke next.

“But you are wrong.”

“How?” she asked slowly, surprised by the sudden turn in the conversation.

“You don’t think I needed you like they did. Teach, you are so wrong. I needed you just as much as them.”

Byleth reached out to him and grabbed his hand, holding it in hers. “Claude, I didn’t mean-“

“I had dreams of a greater future just as they did. My only difference is that I was not willing to sacrifice innocent lives to achieve it.”

Part of her felt the urge to defend Dimitri and his actions during the war, she but couldn't bring herself to speak.

Claude lifted up Byleth’s hand and gently held it between his. “I dream of a world bigger than Fodlan. There is so much more out there. I dream of a world where people can live together in harmony, no matter where they come from. A world where people are judged by who they are rather than by where they come from. A world where children with mixed heritage, children like me, can grow up without persecution.”

“Claude…”

“Sorry if that sounds foolish.”

“It doesn’t. It’s admirable you feel that way. I’d love to live in a world where everyone is treated equally."

“I wish you would have chosen me. We could have achieved this dream together.”

“We still could.”

Claude’s hands, still holding hers, moved to caress hers. With his fingers, he rotated the ring she wore - the ring that symbolized the vows she made to Dimitri. “Teach, you have already made your choice,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. He was looking at her ring now, not daring to meet her eyes. If he hadn’t crossed any lines before, he definitely crossed one now.

Byleth’s breath hitched. She allowed herself to imagine a future where she had chosen to lead Claude’s house. She thought of the Golden Deer, alive, standing with her and Claude as they united Fodlan as one. She imagined her and Claude, hand in hand, uniting Fodlan and Almyra in an alliance stronger than any in history.

“What if I could choose again?” She said the words before she’d have the chance to regret them. She took her free hand and placed it on Claude’s arm, a silent invitation for his touch.

Without missing a beat, Claude used that arm to pull Byleth closer to him. “Then choose again.”

The pair were now inches from each other, staring into each other's eyes - into the swirling abyss of emotions contained in each. The tension between them skyrocketed, rising higher and higher until it could no longer be contained.

And when it spilled over, the two of them collided in an explosion of passion. Lips met forcefully, hands reached out to explore the unknowns of their bodies.

“You are about to make all of my wildest dreams come true,” Claude whispered into her ear. It was the last coherent thing she processed before the two of them fully gave in to the potent emotions and primal desires that held them together, locked in a lover’s embrace.

Much later, after everything between them transpired, the world stilled as the two laid together in each other’s arms. All of Byleth’s thoughts, riled into a flurry from her previous conversation, fell into place.

If only for a moment.

Suddenly, deep with her, a feeling of dread struck her. Whether it was her conscience or Sothis desperately trying to punish her for her sin, Byleth was unsure. She stood up, quickly threw her clothes back on, and brushed her hair with her fingers in an attempt to return to normal.

As her fingers ran through her hair, the ring she wore to symbolize the sacred vows she took burned on her flesh. A reminder of what she had just done. As she looked up to see Claude in front of her, watching her, the reality of what she did hit her. She broke her marriage vows. She betrayed Dimitri, the man she loved. The man she _chose_.

“Claude… this was wrong.”

He said nothing. He looked at her with a look of guilt, sadness, and longing. 

“I have to go,” she said as she quickly left her study, shutting the door behind her. 

Claude sat there and listened to the sound of Byleth’s frantic footsteps fleeing. Everything that had just transpired between the pair happened just as he always imagined it would.

Except for the ending. In Claude's mind, he had dared to hope that Byleth would choose him and stay with him. And, as before, his hopes were crushed. He had miscalculated, just when he though he finally had Byleth figured out. 

“I should have known she’d choose you again, Dimitri,” Claude said to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mmm whatcha sayyyy


	3. Regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth begins processing the guilt from what she and Claude did. After sharing a highly intimate moment with Dimitri, she realizes some choices cannot be undone.

As Byleth crept through the halls of the palace, she desperately tried to activate her divine pulse. Years of non-use had led to her power diminishing over time.

It was no use. Her once great power was hidden deep within her, just as Sothis’ conscience was. What she had just done was now written upon her life.

With a sad sigh, she opened the door to her bedroom. Dimitri was there, as expected, sleeping soundly. He looked so peaceful and content. Byleth's heart fractured into pieces at the thought of him finding out about her betrayal.

She would have to tell him eventually. But not now. She needed to come to terms with what happened with Claude and make peace with herself before she could ever dare ask Dimitri for forgiveness.

Slowly, so that she would not disturb her husband, she climbed into their bed and laid next to him. She closed her eyes and listened to the soft sounds of Dimitri’s breathing.

This was where she belonged.

\--

Byleth was not able to sleep much, but when she awoke from what little rest she got, Dimitri was gone. A part of her was grateful for it, as she did not yet have the courage to face him. Another part of her was scared that somehow, he already knew. With everything she felt, the most apparent emotion was shame. She was ashamed she could willingly betray someone she loved.

Many of her students were still in the palace, but Byleth was in no mood to socialize. Byleth utilized her position as Archbishop and used the work that piled up over the last few days as a convenient excuse to avoid interaction. She initially regretted avoiding her work to help Hilda plan the party, but now she was grateful for it.

Byleth tried locking herself in her study, but the familiar atmosphere kept filling her mind with images from last night. Every time she looked over at the couches, she saw Claude sitting there looking at her. She could still feel the intensity of his gaze cutting through her. If she concentrated hard enough, she could even smell the scent of Almyran pine needles lingering from the doorway…

And that simply would not do. Byleth abruptly grabbed her things and headed to the palace library. That area of the palace was not often used, so she knew it would be a good place to have some alone time. It provided the perfect haven for her to get through her work without any intrusive thoughts plaguing her.

She began peering through a set of documents that Seteth had requested she review. As the Archbishop, she was expected to be familiar with all tenets of Seiros’ teachings and act as the authority on them. Seteth was very firm on his expectations of Byleth; oftentimes she felt as if he should have been the one appointed Archbishop instead of her. But, of course, fate had chosen her for the role. Byleth read the words on each page, taking them in until they blurred together and faded to nothingness.

Byleth felt a hand on her shoulder gently nudging her awake. She blinked away the lingering sleep before realizing that she must have fallen asleep. She turned to see Dimitri leaning over her, smiling softly at her. Concern was evident in his lone eye. "There you are, sleepyhead. I was having trouble finding you. I was starting to get worried." He took a hand and brushed it against her cheek. "You look very pale. Are you feeling alright? Please don't overwork yourself, my love."

His loving concern for her well-being caused guilt to flood into her mind again. In a second, she pushed it back. She'd tell him soon, when she was ready. Now was not the time. In the meantime, she did not want to do anything that would make him suspicious. It would hurt him beyond repair if he found out through any means other than her own mouth.

"I think I am just stressed because of all of the work I neglected," she lied, gesturing to papers strewn about. What was neat stacks of paper was now a cluttered mess thanks to her impromptu nap. “Seteth is already putting a lot of pressure on me, and my deadline is approaching quickly. If I don’t-“

Her words ceased as Dimitri grabbed her arms and pulled her into a hug. "You always were such a hard worker," he thought aloud. “Please take care of yourself. I don't know what I would do if I lost you." He spoke the words into her shoulder as he held onto her. The words tore through her like arrows on the battlefield; the guilt she had buried earlier was starting to resurface.

Byleth pulled away and smiled tenderly, even though she was startled by his sudden intensity. "Dimitri, I appreciate your concern, but where is this coming from?"

"I don't know. I suppose last night has left me feeling nostalgic. Seeing everyone together again like that truly felt like old times. It made me remember..." Dimitri trailed off.

"Remember…?” Byleth prompted.

"It made me remember that I’ve forgotten.” His lips curled into a slight smile upon seeing Byleth’s bewildered expression. “Whenever I try to remember those times, or the horrible things I've done, I can't. All I know from those times is a bleak darkness... and you. I see nothing but you, reaching out your hand to me."

"Dimitri..."

"Everything that I am today, I owe to you. You saved me from the brink of destruction. I don't think you will ever realize how much you mean to me. And last night made me realize some things."

"What things?" Byleth asked, holding back tears. Dimitri was thinking of her last night, while she was in the arms of another.

"I know our responsibilities drive us apart. There are days we must act as strangers and not speak to one another. There are days where our respective duties drive us into heated arguments. But know that no matter what happens in my line of duty, I am always thinking of you, and my heart will never change."

"Dimitri," she said, her voice cracking. "I don't deserve a man like you."

"You're right," he said, planting a kiss on her lips. "You deserve so much more than me."

If only he knew how wrong he was.

Silently, and without warning, Dimitri made his way towards the door. Byleth’s confusion only lasted for a moment, as she realized Dimitri's intentions when he placed the door's bar down, preventing anyone else from walking in on them.

As he moved back towards her, she expected him to grab her and pull her into a fit of passion. However, Dimitri stopped inches away from her and looked at her thoughtfully. He looked afraid.

"I think that I am finally ready to show you the real me," he whispered to her.

Byleth opened her mouth to question him, but words evaded her as Dimitri moved his hand to take off his eyepatch. Only a gasp could be heard from Byleth. She could not stop the tears from falling as, for the first time, her husband was choosing to show her his biggest insecurity.

As the fabric fell to the floor, Byleth stared at her husband in awe. To this day, he has never told Byleth about what happened. She never asked; she simply accepted him as he was. She settled for waiting for the day when he was ready to talk about it with her. For now, she was content with just seeing it.

Cautiously, she walked towards him, slowly outstretching her hand to him. He did not turn away. Byleth ran her fingers over the ragged scar that forced the skin shut. Dimitri's breathing slowed, and he closed his other eye in acceptance of his wife's touch. A hint of a smile appeared on his lips.

"I must not look as monstrous as I think I do," he said, his voice cracking. 

"No. Never." Byleth wondered how Dimitri could still think himself a monster. He was far from it. In this moment, in their exchange of raw emotional intimacy, Dimitri never looked more human. "I would never change anything about you," she said between sobs.

Dimitri opened his unscarred eye and allowed his tears to fall as well. His wife's reassurance was liberating.

Byleth grabbed him and wrapped him in a tight embrace, comforting him. The sounds of his sobs hurt her deeply. And, again, the guilt she tried so hard to push away began returning like a sickness. She wondered how she could ever forgive herself for betraying him.

\--

It was evening now, and everyone was gathering at the castle gates for a final farewell before going their separate ways. Byleth knew she was expected to see off her precious students. Somehow, she found the strength to face everyone after what she had done. She even braced herself to say goodbye to Claude, though she knew that she would never be able to look the King of Almyra in the eye again - especially after the intimate moment she just shared with Dimitri.

There were sad smiles and tears all around as everyone left the palace to return to their lives. Byleth hoped this reunion would help everyone stay in better contact with each other. She promised herself she would make a better effort to reach out to her pupils more. As she hugged each person goodbye, her pulse quickened as she realized she was moments away from being face-to-face with Claude. 

And before she knew it, there he was, standing in front of her. His face showed no emotion. Against her greater judgment, Byleth dared look him in the eye. His eyes betrayed him; they showed the feelings he was trying so hard to hide. She could see the sadness and longing within them; the same thing she saw in them last night before she ran away.

He took Byleth's hand in his and kissed it. He said something to her, but she couldn’t comprehend it. Something distracted her from hearing him. As Claude spoke, she felt him forcefully open her hand and place something inside. 

It was a note, by the feel of it. Claude smirked slightly as Byleth's nostrils flared in anger. How could he do something so foolish in front of everyone?

She turned her head to look at Dimitri and hoped to Sothis that he did not see anything. Thankfully, Dimitri was engrossed in conversation with Hilda. Byleth could not help but wonder if Claude had her distract him on purpose.

"Safe travels, Claude," Byleth said coolly, her face and voice as expressionless as it was in her youth. Covertly, she tucked the note into her breastplate.

Claude merely winked at her before moving to wish Dimitri farewell. Byleth took her place at her husband's side as Claude walked back to his wyvern and began his trip back to Almyra. Byleth felt both relieved and sad as she watched him fly away with his battalion.

When everyone was out of sight, she mumbled an excuse about being behind with her work and returned to the library. She made sure to bar the door behind her before moving to stand in front of the fire that she had lit earlier while she was reading.

She allowed herself to recall last night's events. She remembered Claude looking at her, eyes sparkling with hope, as he asked her to choose again - to choose him over Dimitri.

But Byleth had already made her choice. Years ago, when she chose to teach the Blue Lion house and mentor those students. Years ago, when she didn't give up on Dimitri and helped him reclaim his Kingdom. Years ago, when Dimitri proposed to her and they swapped rings.

She could not choose again. She could not change the past. Last night's events gave her a glimpse of what could have been, had she chosen differently.

But she didn't.

And so, Byleth took the note from her breastplate and held it between her fingers. She already made her choice, and she was choosing her husband. Whatever was written on the note would likely cause her to question her choice, just as she had done last night.

She would not question her choice again. Byleth stared upon the fire, watching the flames flicker up, eager for destruction. She leaned forward and tossed Claude's note into the flames, its contents still unknown to her. She watched as the note turned to ash and the words contained within were lost forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think the note said?


	4. Consequences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth travels to Garreg Mach under the guise of work to think of a way to break the news to Dimitri. While she is there, the stress and worry of her situation cause her to become physically ill, and Seteth begins to suspect something.

Three weeks after the reunion, Byleth still had not spoken of what happened between her and Claude to anyone. She spent her time torn between pretending to be normal in front of everyone and hiding away to try and figure out a way to break the news to Dimitri. However, whenever she tried to isolate herself, he would always find her and push her further from telling him. He was too good to her.

Once she realized she wasn't getting anywhere, she became acutely aware of the fact that she had been neglecting her work. This realization struck hardest during a tense moment in a war council meeting. Sylvain had warned them during the class reunion that border skirmishes have become more frequent in his territory. Two days ago, a letter with the seal of House Gautier arrived with a formal request for reinforcements. Dimitri knew this would not be easy to do as most of the Fhaergus army was deployed in previous Empire territory to prevent potential rebellions among loyalists. He called a war council meeting between two of his generals stationed in Empire territory, the Archbishop, himself, Dedue, and a few of his lesser-ranked knights. Dimitri wanted to ascertain the feasibility of sending Sylvain reinforcements before issuing any orders.

"I see what you are saying, Your Majesty, but we cannot afford to send fifty men to Gautier territory," said the general in charge of the occupation in House Varley territory, a Fhaergus-born soldier.

"Why not?” responded King Dimitri. “The Varley territories have by far been the most peaceful with the least number if rebellions. Of all the Empire occupations, you are the most prepared to send reinforcements."

"Sending fifty men across the continent would greatly reduce morale. Need I remind you that Saint Indech day is next week; Indech is the patron saint of the Varley region. Many of the soldiers see this day as a sacred holiday,” said the second General, an Empire-born soldier who had defected shortly before the Empire’s defeat. Dimitri didn’t fully trust this man, which is why he had two generals assigned to the area.

"I would assume only the Adrestian born soldiers would feel this way, yes? We do not treat the Saints' birthdays as holidays in Fhaergus. Surely you could spare soldiers from Fhaergus, especially any soldiers born in Gautier territory? Or even Alliance-born soldiers?”

"Not participating in Saint Indech day is a grave offense against the Church, is it not? Or do you have special privileges, seeing as you are married to the Archbishop?" said the Empire-born general, to the surprise of everyone in the room.

In these political meetings, it was imperative that Dimitri and Byleth place their respective roles above their marriage. This often proved difficult, and Dimitri did not take kindly to having to listen to his subordinate show such disrespect to his wife. 

"I do not know what you are trying to imply, but you will not speak about your Queen in such a manner," Dimitri warned. 

Byleth was quick to restore order, though deep inside she was grateful for Dimitri's defense. "Your Majesty, please keep in mind that in this room I am not your Queen, but your Archbishop."

Dimitri frowned in response; Byleth turned her attention to the offending general. "General, as the Archbishop I decree that nobody will be forced to celebrate anything. I believe the goddess created humans with the right to choose their customs.” Byleth looked around to see a few of Dimitri’s knights and the Fhaergus-born general nod in approval before continuing.

“The church is meant to follow the word of Seiros, not what you believe,” responded the General.

“That is ENOUGH,” Dimitri nearly yelled. “This meeting is about sparing reinforcements, not your personal feelings on the Church.”

Byleth continued, ignoring the sting of his comments. “General, considering the size of your army, I am certain you will have no trouble finding fifty volunteers to travel to Gautier territory. As His Majesty just said, citizens of Fhaergus prefer to worship the goddess over the saints. I do respect that you feel differently, but I am sure soldiers born from these regions will not mind travelling."

"If it works better, I would ask you send twenty-five soldiers instead," Dimitri offered.

"It will be done, Your Majesty,” said the Fhaergus general quickly, not giving his comrade the chance for outburst.

"Alright. Send your reinforcements to Fraldarius territory. Lord Felix has agreed to provide supplies. From there, your men will be routed to Gautier territory. I expect a written report within a fortnight detailing the names and ranks of the soldiers sent. You are dismissed. And General, in future meetings I expect you to afford the Archbishop with the respect Her Grace deserves.”

Both generals left, followed by Dimitri’s knights. The empire-born general looked as if he wanted to say something, but Dimitri’s knights gracefully pushed him out before he had the chance to.

Dedue, who has been standing at Dimitri’s side, spoke up. "Your Majesty, perhaps it is best to not include the Archbishop in these meetings. If your soldiers feel unrest against the new direction the Church is taking, they need to voice their concerns appropriately. War councils are not the place for such comments. If we can, we should avoid any opportunity for these situations to arise."

"It was my fault Dedue," said Byleth. "I have fallen very behind on my Church readings. Had I known the significance of Saint Indech day in that area, I could have acted sooner. I also admit I am not as familiar with Seiros’ teachings as I ought to be given my position.”

"You may be right, but you cannot possibly blame yourself for that outburst," Dimitri responded. “It is likely he harbors animosity over the outcome of the war, and he is targeting you to get a rise out of me.” Dimitri shook his head. “I've seen such childish antics before, when sitting in on my father’s war council meetings as a child.”

Byleth looked down thoughtfully; an idea suddenly popped into her head. What if she left the palace for a while to stay at Garreg Mach? She could catch up on her work and have her precious alone time. Finally, she could prepare herself to inform Dimitri of the incident between her and Claude.

"You know, it's been a while since I have travelled to the Monastery. Perhaps it is time for another trip? I could use some tutelage from Seteth. That way, I'd be more prepared if I have to meet with that man again."

"Are you sure that's necessary? I know you haven't been to Garreg Mach in a while, but still," said Dimitri.

Byleth nodded. At last, she saw a way out; a temporary reprieve from the guilt hanging over her every time she looked upon her husband's face.

\--

The next morning, Dimitri and Ingrid had reached an agreement that she would escort Byleth to Garreg Mach before heading to the Gautier region to assist Sylvain with the border crisis. Byleth was a little curious about Ingrid's desire to help, even though the pair were old friends; she remembered how they were all over each other the night of the reunion.

Byleth planned to spend two weeks at Garreg Mach. This would be enough time to devote to her studies without being away from the Capitol for too long. Due to the short notice of the trip, Seteth was not informed of her arrival. Not that she needed to inform him, anyway.

With a quick farewell to Dimitri, Byleth climbed on the back of Ingrid's Pegasus and the two were off, flying against the radiant beams of the morning sun. During the flight, Byleth asked Ingrid a few questions regarding Sylvain, but the dutiful knight did not divulge much information about her relationship with the red-haired noble. Byleth expected as much; Ingrid was always one of her most clever and dedicated students.

A few hours later, the two touched down at the gates of the Monastery. Byleth, dressed in her Enlightened One outfit, was recognized immediately. The shopkeepers waved to her happily as she headed towards the front entrance.

"Greetings Professor! Ah, Archbishop! Sorry! Old habits die hard. Nothing to report!" shouted the Gatekeeper as he waved for Byleth and Ingrid to be let through.

Many of the monks who saw the pair stopped to wish them well; they were pleased to see their Archbishop was making a visit. Byleth wondered how many months it had been since her last visit as she and Ingrid made their way to the audience room, where Seteth was awaiting them. "Ah, Archbishop! Ingrid! I am surprised yet pleased to see you both here."

"Greetings, Seteth," replied Byleth. "Sorry for the short notice, but I will be staying here for two weeks. Ingrid has accompanied me for the travel. She will not be staying, as she has orders elsewhere.”

Ingrid gave a polite curtsy to Seteth. “Nice to see you, Mr. Seteth. I would love to stay, but my duty calls me elsewhere. Archbishop, please write if you need me. Otherwise, you know where I’ll be.”

Ingrid left as Seteth looked at Byleth with a curious gaze. “This is sudden. Do you bring news?” he asked.

“No, I was hoping you could help me catch up on my studies.”

She did not dare tell him the truth of her visit.

\--

Byleth had only been at the monastery a few days, but she had been unable to focus on her studies. She was foolish for even thinking she could. The only thing on her mind was how she could tell Dimitri what she had done without destroying her marriage. The stress of it all was so bad that Byleth was starting to feel physically ill. Byleth didn’t even visit the grave of her father like she had planned. She hadn’t seen him in so long, and yet, she could not bear to face him.

Nearly every morning, Byleth would wake before dawn, her mind fresh with nightmares regarding her betrayal. Sometimes in her dreams, Claude would return to Fodlan and sabotage her marriage. Sometimes, Dimitri would find out the truth and leave her. Her nightmares would distress her to the point where she would vomit shortly after waking.

Astute as ever, Seteth caught on to her quickly. One morning, while trying to explain the significance of a historical battle to her, he noticed as her eyes dulled as a wave of nausea washed over her. “Byleth, you look like you should be resting instead of studying,” he said, concerned. “Is something going on?”

"I am just stressed, Seteth. I am sure it will pass shortly.”

Seteth frowned. "No, no, I insist you see Manuela. There is no need for you to suffer in silence. She can provide you with some medical herbs to alleviate your worries."

The offer did sound tempting. Not that Byleth could refuse Seteth, anyway. He would keep bringing it up until she finally went to see Manuela. Without putting up more of a fight, she traveled to the infirmary.

"Ah! Hello, Archbishop! What brings you in here?" Manuela looked just as Byleth remembered her, but there were signs of age showing around her lovely brown eyes. A sure sign of the years that had gone by and the stress of the war. Both Manuela and Hanneman had assisted Byleth during the battle of Garreg Mach, and she made them members of the Fhaergus army once she returned from her five-year slumber. After the war, Manuela had decided to return to Garreg Mach as a physician while Hanneman accepted a research position in Fhirdiad’s School of Magic.

Byleth stopped her reminiscing and answered Manuela’s question. "Seteth has been fretting over me and thinks I should get some medicinal herbs from you."

"That doesn’t surprise me. Why is he worried, though? Are you feeling alright?”

Byleth frowned. She had to lie, again. "I think I am just overwhelmed with my duties as Archbishop and Queen. I have been very worried and stressed lately.”

"I see. Well, we can’t have you overworking yourself. How about you lie down, and I give you a quick look over with my magic? I must make sure you can use the herbs safely. They aren't for everyone, you know."

Byleth obliged and laid across the futon. The warm haze of Manuela's white magic soothed her as the physician held her arms over her.

"What symptoms are you feeling as a result of your stress?"

"Mainly nightmares. I have trouble sleeping because of them. Sometimes they are so vivid I wake up feeling sick. I also feel tired throughout the day because of my lack of sleep. My whole body is sore, too."

The ex-songstress nodded. "Yes, I am sensing a lot of tenseness in your muscles. Try to relax." Manuela focusing very intently on examining the woman, exerting an unusually high amount of magic.

The exam continued quietly, with Byleth enjoying the blissful way the magic left her feeling. If the medical herbs felt like this, perhaps she would be able to sleep through the night for once.

"Byleth, I don't think I can give you the herbs," Manuela said suddenly, pulling her magic away.

"What? Why?"

Manuela looked at her thoughtfully. "Well... I think you might be pregnant."

No amount of white magic could calm Byleth from the effects of hearing those words. She stared at Manuela, trying to process what she heard. She felt the world around her freeze, threatening to shatter.

Manuela smiled at her. "Why do you look so surprised? Your symptoms match up perfectly. You feel sick in the mornings. You are having trouble sleeping and fatigue. My magic is detecting abnormal hormones from you. Yes, you are most definitely pregnant. Is this not a possibility for you?"

Gods. Byleth felt so stupid. Of course it had been a possibility. For almost a year now she had stopped drinking her contraceptive tea. While she and Dimitri weren't actively trying to conceive, there was still pressure to produce an heir. They had decided to leave them having a child to the whims of fate. And now, fate decided it wanted to slap her in the face by making her pregnant during the worst possible time.

"Manuela? Do you know this for certain?"

"I am about ninety-five percent certain you are."

Byleth cursed internally. She wouldn't hesitate to send an ally into battle over those odds. She was definitely pregnant. "Do you have any idea how far along I am?"

Manuela laughed. "Considering you weren't aware, I'm guessing you haven't noticed your missing cycle yet. If I had to guess, you are anywhere from three to five weeks."

"Oh," was all Byleth could manage. She never bothered tracking her cycle. She always assumed that she'd just wake up one morning and realize she was pregnant. Being raised by a single dad led to her never caring much for these matters. She was never educated on such sensitive topics.

"This is a very critical time in a pregnancy. Please take care of yourself and try to reduce your stress. It may also be a good idea not to announce it yet, just in case."

"I... absolutely,” said Byleth, unsure of how to respond.

Without warning, Manuela wrapped her in a tight hug. Byleth was on the verge of breaking down. “Do not fear, Archbishop. I am always here for you, and would be honored to deliver your child, if you should need that of me.”

“Thank you, Manuela. If you excuse me, I needed to process this information.”

Feeling the sickness wash over her again, Byleth nearly sprinted to her quarters. She locked her door and frantically tore through her papers on her desk to find her calendar. She compared today’s date to the dates she had been intimate Dimitri and to that night with Claude.

It was no use. She could not rule anything out. The dates were all too close together.

She dropped the calendar as she fell to the floor sobbing. What was supposed to be a happy time in her life was now marred by her betrayal.

She was pregnant, and there was a chance her husband was not the father.

\--

Byleth was unsure how much time had passed as she sat on her bed and stared into nothingness. She was sure Sothis had pulled her from the flow of time completely, leaving her adrift with her thoughts. 

A gentle knock on her door rooted her back to reality. "Pardon the intrusion, but may I come in?" It was Seteth.

Byleth summoned the strength to unlock her door and allow him entry. Without looking at him, she returned to sit atop her bed. Seteth chose to sit at her desk, moving the chair to face her.

"Seeing as you did not return to your lesson, I have reached out to Manuela regarding your health out of concern. She has informed me of your situation,” he said after a few moments of tense silence.

Byleth just looked at him with wide, panicked eyes as he continued. She was certain he could see the redness on her cheeks and puffiness in her eyes. "Considering the importance of this event and the stress you are feeling, it is important that you focus on your health and the health of your child. Therefore, I think it is best that I take over some of your duties.”

"You don't have to do that," Byleth protested.

"It is no worry. I can handle it with ease. The baby you are carrying will be the heir to the Kingdom. It is imperative we keep that in mind to ensure a healthy pregnancy.”

Byleth frowned and looked away from him. She had not planned on telling Seteth anything, but he was making it very difficult to keep the truth from him.

"Archbishop... no, Byleth. Forgive me, but I must say that bringing a child into the world is supposed to be a happy time. You do not look very happy. Is there anything on your mind? I have entrusted you with my secret regarding Flayn, so you should know I have some experience in the matter."

"Thank you, Seteth, that means a lot," she said. Seteth was her most trusted advisor, and although he was often strict with her, she also considered him a friend. Byleth wondered if telling him about what happened would help her eventually tell Dimitri. Surely, if she could manage to get the words out once, she could do it again?

"You look like you have something more to say," he whispered gently. 

She gazed at him sadly. "Seteth, if I tell you what is on my mind, you must never speak of it to anyone."

"You have my word."

"I mean anyone. Not even Flayn. What we discuss shall not leave this room."

"I swear on it."

"There is a chance - a small one, but still a chance - that Dimitri is not the father of the baby."

Saying the words aloud for the first time made everything feel even more real. The temperature of the room felt twenty degrees cooler. Seteth stared at her in blank shock, likely trying to consider how this could have happened.

Eventually, before the silence drove her to madness, Seteth hummed in thought. "I certainly explains your strange behavior more than a mere pregnancy would. Ah.. yes, this could certainly be a problem - it could mess up the line of succession,” he said.

"I am aware of that."

"Does the King know any of this?”

"No. I was going to tell him when I returned. But I don't know if I can anymore; I didn’t know I was pregnant, and this really complicates things." Tears welled in her eyes.

"You must tell him before the birth. The longer you wait, the more the news will hurt him. And knowing Dimitri's… well, past instability, I fear how he will react."

Byleth wiped away her tears, not wanting to look as weak as she felt. Could she bring herself to tell Seteth the rest?

Seteth spoke again, this time more harshly. "I also recommend stopping whatever affair you are having immediately. It is not becoming of the Archbishop of the Church of Seiros to partake in such activities. Adultery goes against the teachings of the Church.”

Byleth felt herself shrink into near nothingness at the sound of the disappointment in his voice. "Seteth, it isn't like that. I am not having an affair. What happened between me and... _him_ was a one-time thing. A singular, ill-timed mistake that I do not intend to make again."

Seteth nodded. "I am glad to hear that. If I may ask... the other potential father... does he hold any societal importance? I fear the line of succession could become even more complicated if he is a highborn noble, especially one with a territory. Along with other matters of propriety-" Seteth gasped. "Is the father Sylvain Gautier? I always KNEW he was nothing but trouble.”

Byleth felt embarrassed at the notion of being with Sylvain. "No, it is not him."

Seteth's curious gaze filled her with dread. She already confessed to the act; she might as well tell him the whole truth. Especially considering the political implications of her actions.

She took a deep breath. "The other potential father... is Claude."

"Claude... as in Claude von Riegan? As in... the newly crowned King of Almyra?! Please, _please_ tell me you are in jest." 

Byleth felt small again. "I am sorry," she whispered, her voice cracking.

"I am not the one you should be apologizing to." He rubbed his temples with his hands. "By the goddess, you mean to say this baby could be the heir to one of TWO possible thrones?"

It was the worst-case scenario, but she had to consider it. As a tactician, it was her duty to consider all possible outcomes and plan for them. "I know I messed up. I will handle things Dimitri myself," said Byleth. "Seteth, I need you to tell me what to do. If the baby is Claude's... the political scandal... I need help." She was so overwhelmed that she could not properly finish her sentence.

"If you were to tell Dimitri right now, would he retaliate and make the news public? We want to avoid this at all costs. Have you considered how the King would react?”

“I’ve spent every day considering how Dimitri would react, Seteth. That is why I am so stressed.”

Byleth knew Dimitri well, but even she could not predict how he would react to the news. Would he stay with her, but resign himself to resenting her from afar to keep up with appearances? Or, would he silently leave her and take a new Queen? Or worse, would he tarnish her reputation by telling the entire Kingdom about what she had done? If he did that, what would she do? Return to Garreg Mach? Or would she have to flee to Almyra in shame? She didn’t even want to consider what would happen if the child was born with Claude’s dark skin and hair.

She felt anger flare in her chest. Did Claude do this on purpose? Surely, he must have... no. Byleth forced herself to stop her thoughts. She couldn't blame Claude for what happened. He didn't force himself on her; she chose, willingly, to lie with him as she should only lie with her husband.

She made the choice, and now she had to take accountability for her actions. "Seteth, I need to return home to my husband and tell him the truth." She looked at him sadly. "Thank you for listening to me and offering me your council."

He bowed respectfully to her. "We have all done things we regret. I will go ahead and make the preparations for your departure."

Byleth was left alone in her quarters. For the first time in weeks, she felt a sense of peace. She could not avoid doing the right thing any longer. She was going to tell Dimitri the truth when she returned. She owed him that much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We love a dramatic cliché in our fanfiction.


	5. Deception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth returns home and informs Dimitri of her condition. In time, she reveals the whole truth to him and braces herself for the impacts that the news will have on their relationship.

Because Ingrid was still away in Gautier territory, Seteth had asked Cyril to fly Byleth back to Fhirdiad on his wyvern. Seteth assured Byleth that he would do whatever he could to prevent the people from worrying or becoming suspicious; everyone at the monastery had been expecting her to stay the full two weeks and would likely panic upon hearing of the Archbishop's sudden departure. They both agreed that the best course of action would be to keep the pregnancy a secret at the monastery. It was up to Byleth and Dimitri to act how they saw fit. It was their news to announce, after all.

The trip back to Fhirdiad was a rough one. The royal palace was heavily guarded, and without prior warning it would be impossible for Cyril to fly Byleth anywhere near the grounds without being shot down by a wary archer. Therefore, the pair had to land in the marketplace, which was a few blocks away from the palace entrance. Cyril had no idea why Byleth needed to return home in a hurry, but he was happy to follow any order given by the Archbishop. Though, throughout the trip, he made it a point to continuously inform Byleth of how much he missed Lady Rhea.

Cyril and Byleth had departed Garreg Mach in the early hours of the morning, leaving before the sun had a chance to peak over the horizon. When they arrived in Fhirdiad, it was about midmorning. Unfortunately, travel on a wyvern was much less faster and much less smoother than travel on a pegasus. Byleth realized this the hard way when she immediately vomited upon landing. A combination of morning sickness, motion sickness, and anxiety left her feeling completely sick to her stomach. She had tried to it to herself so she would not alarm Cyril, but she could only hold back for so long. 

Cyril watched her as she doubled over, unsure of how to react. "My lady, are you alright?"

Byleth wiped her mouth and tried to summon the last shreds of her dignity as she turned to face Cyril. "Sorry, just a little motion sickness." 

Cyril escorted her to the gates, trying his best to not attract the attention of the people. This was easier said than done, considering the gigantic wyvern he had in tow. Although it was springtime in Fodlan, and the winter's chill could still be felt in Fhirdiad, the midmorning sun made it more difficult for Byleth to tolerate her nausea. She was trying her hardest to keep herself together while in view of so many people. The pair had just made it past the first gate of the palace when she fell over and vomited again. This time, one of the guards saw it and called for a healer. Byleth was unable to protest and resigned herself to her fate as three ladies took her arms and led her to the infirmary.

\--

Byleth resorted to near-violence as she adamantly refused any type examination. She did not want anyone in the palace discovering she was pregnant - not until she had a chance to tell Dimitri herself. She knew well enough that they would not consider her feelings and run immediately to tell the King if they discovered her condition. 

Byleth settled for lying about her vomiting being due to motion sickness and dehydration. One of the healers brought her a tonic, which she refused to drink out of fear of harming the baby. This resulted in a verbal spat between her and the head healer, an older woman with many decades of healing experience.

In the middle of the argument, Dimitri burst in the room, eager to ascertain his wife's condition the second he received word of her emergency return to the palace. His lone blue eye was wide open with fear as he made his way to his wife's bedside; his cape flew wildly behind him as he moved with haste.

"Your Majesty," said the healer. "The Queen is sick, but she is refusing to receive any treatment."

"I told you, I don't need it," said Byleth, trying not to lose her rapidly thinning patience. However, her body betrayed her as seeing Dimitri so concerned for her sent a shockwave of guilt through her so strong that it resulted her doubling over to vomit again.

She felt Dimitri grip her shoulder gently as she did so. "My love, please consider taking the medicine. If you are so sick, why wouldn't you?" He sounded worried and genuinely confused.

She wiped her mouth and looked at him, her haunting green eyes wide with terror. "Dimitri..." she trailed.

Dimitri was now holding her both arms. "What is it?" He looked absolutely terrified, but he spoke to her and held her with such gentleness.

"I can tell you why, but she needs to leave," Byleth said, motioning to the head healer. "I am sorry."

Dimitri turned to the woman. "Please, leave us. And shut the door."

She nodded and complied.

"Byleth, please, you are worrying me greatly. I received word in the middle of my meeting that you had to make an emergency return to Fhirdiad. And now, your eyes are glazed over and you keep vomiting. Are you sick? Why won't you accept treatment?"

"I..." Byleth began, pausing to figure out how to say the words she needed. There was so much to tell him; where could she even start? 

She bit her lip and looked at him, trying to choose the words that would inevitably break his heart.

She couldn't do it. She could not tell Dimitri the whole truth. She could fight against the toughest opponents, brave the worst injuries, but in this tender moment with her husband, she was weak. So weak.

"I wanted you to be the first to know. I don't want to take the medicine because it might hurt the baby."

Dimitri stared at her with a wide eye and an open mouth. "What baby?"

Byleth's eyes filled with tears. "I started feeling sick when I arrived at Garreg Mach. Manuela examined me, and she discovered that I am with child."

Dimitri simply blinked, taking in what he just heard.

"I wasn't expecting this.. right now," she said sadly.

"You.. are you saying you are pregnant?" he asked, finally beginning to comprehend the situation.

Byleth nodded.

Dimitri gazed at her for a few moments longer before wrapping her in an embrace so tight, she thought she'd melt out of his arms. Time itself felt like it had stopped as he held her close to him. She felt her heart shatter into fragments once she realized that Dimitri was crying softly into her arms.

"Thank you," he whispered into her shoulder. "You have no idea how much his means to me. Becoming a father... I've always dreamed of this day." He let her go and smiled at her with a smile so bright, she thought she might go blind.

Gods. She definitely couldn't tell him. Not now. She could not destroy the happiness she just gave him. She'd have to tell him eventually, but for now, she decided to let him enjoy the moment.

She wished she could enjoy the moment as he was. She wondered if this was part of her divine punishment as she forced herself to smile back at him. This was supposed to be a happy moment for the both of them. But she knew the truth, and it haunted her.

Dimitri leaned forward and pressed their foreheads together. "Thank you. Thank you for giving me this chance. You've always given me chances, even when I did not deserve them. And now, I am here, because of you." He placed his hands upon her stomach. "I cannot wait for the day we meet our little one."

"Manuela thinks I am between three to five weeks. It's still very early. We have to be careful, and be selective about who we tell."

Dimitri nodded. "Yes, I think it is important only a select few know. Perhaps us, Dedue, and a few chosen healers."

"If we are letting some healers now, I hope they have something for this sickness," she said, feeling a wave of nausea beginning to pass over her once again.

Dimitri gently held Byleth's face and graced her lips with a firm kiss full of love. "I will take care of that. You rest now, my love."

He got up to open the door and flagged down the head healer. He beckoned her closed and whispered into her ear. With a gasp, she looked at Byleth with understanding.

"My Lady!" she exclaimed. "Forgive me for misinterpreting the situation. Allow me to fetch the proper tonic for your illness," she said. Dimitri nodded at her in approval.

Within seconds, the healer offered Byleth a drink that worked wonders. The sickness, fear, and stress all melted away as the warmth of the drink filled her.

Under its effects, she could almost look upon Dimitri without feeling dread over what was to come.

Almost.

\--

Every day that Byleth had decided she was going to tell the Dimitri the truth, she fell back. Whenever she thought she had the strength to speak of it to her husband, a sweet smile and talk of their future would silence her. She continued to put it off until the swell of her belly told her she could no longer do so.

The guilt tormented her all the way through. Enough time had passed that her visible belly forced her and Dimitri to make a public announcement regarding the pregnancy. Byleth had tried to prolong making the news public for as long as possible. She had lied, as always, to Dimitri and told him that she wanted to keep the happiness contained between the two of them for as long as possible. He had happily agreed.

That was the worst lie she had ever told. That lie weighed more heavily upon her heart than anything she had ever done. The countless people she'd cut down, past students included, did not weigh upon her as heavily as this did.

She could not keep the truth from Dimitri any longer. She was just entering her third trimester; she had waited long enough. Longer than she should have, if she was being honest with herself.

There was no going back now. Earlier that morning she had one of her attendants deliver Dimitri a sealed letter requesting that he meet her in her bedchamber that evening to discuss something important. Two weeks earlier, she had sent Seteth a vague but well-coded letter implying that today's date would be the date Dimitri would discovered the truth. She was fully committed; today was the day that she would tell him the news that could potentially destroy their future together - destroy everything they had spent the last few years building. 

Now, the time had come, and Byleth anxiously sat upon her bed rubbing her belly. She and Dimitri's future together was dependent upon this moment. 

Her pulse nearly froze when Dimitri entered the room. She almost lost the will to tell him upon seeing his face. She could tell today had been a long day for him - his shoulders were drooped, causing his regal fur cape to drag along the floor; his hair was even messier than normal, and she could see exhaustion in his eye. Exhaustion that was quickly fading, replaced only by concern. Concern for her that she did not deserve.

"My love, is everything okay? Your letter was very unexpected."

She breathed in a deep breath. This was it. "If I told you everything was okay, I'd be lying."

His face immediately contorted with panic. "What's wrong? Is the baby alright?" A moment later he was at her side, sitting upon the bed with her, feeling her belly.

The lump forming in her throat made it near impossible to speak. The tears fell faster than she could control. And yet, Dimitri was there, sitting beside her on the bed, wiping them away.

"Dimitri... the baby is fine," she sobbed. She pulled his hand away from her face, rejecting his kind touch. Would this be the last time he touched her so gently? Did she even deserve to feel his warmth?

"I don't understand." He sounded so confused. 

"I don't know where to begin," she said. The tears continued to fall, and her breathing sped up.

"Hey, it's alright," Dimitri reassured, attempting to comfort her. Once again, she pulled away from his touch. Understanding her silent message, Dimitri moved aside on the bed to give her space. He stared at her, looking at her with a mixture of hurt and confusion.

"Dimitri, I've done something terrible."

"What is it?"

She closed her eyes. She couldn't bear to see his reaction. "I slept with another man."

He said nothing. Even when she found the courage to open her eyes, he just looked at her with a blank expression. She watched him as her tears dried, waiting for him to accept the news at his own pace.

"When did this happen?" he asked, completely void of emotion. 

She bit her lip. "Some time ago," she said. She wanted to clear the air about this before bringing up the paternity issue. After a long time thinking it over, Byleth had decided it was best to tell Dimitri in pieces rather than all at once.

Finally, she saw emotion in his eyes - anger. "Who was it? Was it someone in the palace? Whoever it was, I will not hesitate to cast them out of the Kingdom."

"I think it will hurt you more to know." She shook her head sadly.

In seconds, his anger shifted to hurt. "Is it someone I know? You have to tell me. I need to know the truth."

"It happened the night of the class reunion."

The hurt shifted back to anger. No, what she saw was more powerful that anger; it was rage. Dimitri had a look in his eye that she hadn't seen in years - not since those dark days of the war.

"Dimitri..." Byleth pleaded. Her own emotions shifted as well, from sadness to fear. It was fear for Dimitri, and fear for the future. "Dimitri, what happened that night will never happen again, I swear to you."

"Stop. If you want to make promises to me, don't bother. Tell me who it was. Was it one of my classmates? One of my _friends_?"

"It was Claude." She said it so quickly, so quietly, that she was unsure he had even heared her.

But he heard her, alright. She could see it as multiple emotions showed themselves on his face. Anger. Hurt. Betrayal. Heartbreak. He felt all of it, and it was all her fault.

"Claude, huh?" He shook his head. "Why him?"

She was stunned by such a direct question. "I... I don't know, I wasn't thinking that night..."

"Why? Why would you do this? I thought..." He paused for a moment. "You helped me become the man I am today. You got me through the toughest time of my life. And now, you are taking it all away from me."

She hated herself for seeing how much pain she was causing him. "Dimitri.."

"I just want to understand why you have done this. Have you always felt this way towards Claude? Did I not make you happy during our marriage? What could I have done differently?"

"Dimitri, please. Don't blame yourself. You did nothing wrong. Claude and I were having a discussion about what could have been if I had chosen to lead his class and both of us got carried away. I regretted it immediately. I have never once regretted anything more than that night, Dimitri. I chose to lead the Blue Lions for a reason. I chose _you_ for a reason. And I may have forgotten why that night, but I will never, ever again forget why I chose you." She held up her hand and showed him her wedding ring. "The night we exchanged rings was the happiest moment in my life. What happened between Claude and I that night does not compare to the countless nights I have shared with you."

"I see," he said somberly. "I am glad you regret it, and I am glad you told me."

"You should also know that when Claude left the next day, he handed me a note. I burned it without reading it. I didn't need to read it, because I have you."

He nodded in response, saying nothing. Byleth wiped her eyes, steeling herself for what was about to come. This was the moment she feared most. 

"There is one more thing you should know," she said. 

He looked at her with sadness and fear. "Haven't you hurt me enough, Byleth?" 

She held her belly tightly. "I need to tell you this. The way the dates worked out..." She choked on her words, unable to finish the accursed sentence.

Dimitri looked at her with an expression of crazed desperation. "I.. no.." he whispered, his voice so full of pain that Byleth thought his words might be enough to end her. "Please don't say it."

"Dimitri, I don't think I can ever express how sorry I am."

"Claude.. is he the father of the baby? _Our_ baby?" He sounded as if he was going to break apart on the bed, right in front of her.

"There is a chance he could be."

Dimitri buried his head in his hands, not holding back the flood of emotions he was experiencing. Byleth watched as his shoulders moved violently with his sobs. She had never wanted to die more in her life than at that moment. She had hoped Sothis would strike her down for hurting the man she was supposed to love in such a way. But that would never happen; instead she had to sit here and watch the consequences of her actions unfold.

The minutes crawled by, slowly and painfully, as Dimitri began to accept the truth. Eventually, he lifted his head and faced his wife with an eerie emptiness in his eye.

"Byleth... I love you... and yet you've ruined me.."

He rose up from the bed, not taking his sight off of her. "You've destroyed me. Why does everything I love destroy me? My parents. Rodrigue. You." He turned away. "My greatest joy in life was having the honor of building a family with you," he whispered.

"Dimitri, in my heart, we are a family and you are the father."

"Your heart means nothing," he spat. "Your heart cannot undo what has been done. If the baby ends up being Claude's, you cannot remain here."

The words hurt her, though she knew it was what she deserved. "I understand." Her heart was heavy with regret.

"It would cause a scandal. And somehow, despite what you have done, I still love you enough to protect you from that."

Byleth was speechless. She truly did not deserve Dimitri. She betrayed him, and yet, he still felt the urge to protect her. She felt humbled beyond measure to call this man her husband. And now, she was on the verge of losing him.

Dimitri walked towards the door, placing his hand on the frame. "I think I need some time apart from you." Those words, even though she had expected to hear them, cut her deeper than any wound she'd received in battle.

"I respect your wishes," she said with sadness.

Dimitri opened the door and paused, willing to say one last thing to his traitorous wife. "I will spend every moment praying for that child to be mine. I've suffered enough. The goddess cannot take my last source of joy from me. Not now."

With those words, he was gone. Their conversation was over. Their relationship was uncertain. It seemed as if their future was dependent upon the child. And she wanted nothing more than for the baby to be Dimitri's.

But only time would tell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who left a comment and/or kudos! I am happy you are all enjoying the drama. I am trying to commit to updating the story every other day, as I have been doing.


	6. Sorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dimitri prepares for the birth of the child while processing his grief away from the public eye.

The Kingdom was in a flurry over the impending royal birth. A new addition to the royal family was always a big event in the Kingdom, but because this child would be the child of the Archbishop AND next in line for the throne of Fhaergus, excitement levels were high. The child became a regular topic of conversation for many citizens - some even began betting pools regarding the child's gender and date of birth.

The palace was aflutter with different type of conversation, however. Many of the palace staff gossiped about King Dimitri's unusual behavior. The King often walked around with a faraway look in his eyes. He was late to nearly every meeting, even missing a few outright. He skipped meals. And, worst of all, he was seldom seen around his wife. Some maids even whispered how he had stopped visiting his wife’s bedchamber at night, but nobody could confirm this.

Dimitri was aware of the palace’s gossip over him. Perhaps he’d care if he had the energy to do so. All Dimitri really wanted was to be able to grieve for his heartbreak over his wife's infidelity, but he couldn't. He was just so tired. He spent so much of his energy saving face and trying (and unfortunately, failing) to appear normal that he never gave himself the time to properly grieve. 

Byleth wanted desperately to help him. She tried so hard to reach out to him, to speak with him, but he shut her out every time. Whenever she met his eye, he would look at her with sadness and hurt before turning away. They had not discussed the affair since the night she confessed. In fact, they barely discussed anything at all. Any conversations between them after that night were always brief. The topics were either about work or about the baby; Dimitri would walk away from any other conversation. They now acted as if they were in an arranged marriage, rather than two loving spouses.

That thought hurt Dimitri even more. He desperately wished for the gentle touch of his wife to comfort him during these hard times, but he knew that very touch was the reason he felt this way in the first place. How fortunate this all happened to the man he is today, and not to his past self. The Dimitri of the past – the war-ravaged, monstrous being he used to be – would not have reacted as elegantly to the situation as he was now. And, ironically, he had Byleth to thank for that.

Dimitri had told himself that he would keep the affair a secret between himself, Byleth, and Claude. He did not want a scandal breaking out, especially not before Byleth gave birth. He needed to protect her, for the sake of the baby. And for her sake, even. However, Dimitri knew it would be wise to get a second opinion on the situation. The only person he could trust with such a thing was Dedue. Dedue was surprised to hear the news; he had not expected someone as stoic as his Professor to do such a scandalous thing. Of course, Dedue’s opinion did not differ much from Dimitri’s; he told the King that preventing a political scandal should be their top priority. 

Dimitri sighed. He was supposed to be preparing for a meeting with some minor lords. He had yet to go over the notes from last week’s meeting – notes taken by Dedue since Dimitri had arrived late and missed most of the meeting. And, yet again, it seemed as if he was going to be late because he was too distracted by his heartache.

Dimitri pulled from his neck a chain which held the ring Byleth had given him years ago. The ring did not fit Dimitri; it was a woman's ring and was too small for him. Still, the ring meant a lot to Byleth and Dimitri was honored to receive it. He rubbed the ring between his fingers and frowned. Despite everything she had done; despite the great pain she had caused him, he could not bring himself to stop wearing the ring. It meant too much to him. _She_ meant too much to him.

Dedue had asked Dimitri if he could forgive either of them for what they had done. Dimitri had to think that one over.

Could he forgive Byleth? Possibly. It would take time for the scars she created to heal, but it could be done. If the child was his, they'd have to heal for the sake of their family. And maybe, after enough time had passed, he would be able to heal for his own sake, as well.

But he could not bring himself to forgive Claude. He had shown Claude nothing but kindness and hospitality since the day they first met. He had even risked his own life for him when he saved him during the Empire’s invasion of Derdriu! He did all of this, only for Claude to try and take his wife from him.

Dimitri stood up from his desk and pushed the papers he needed for the meeting onto the floor in a fit of rage. It was childish, but he was alone, and he needed the release.

Dimitri wanted nothing more than to cut all ties with Almyra so that he would never have to see Claude again. However, Dimitri knew well enough at this point that in order to be a good King for his people, he needed to separate his personal feelings from politics. He knew it would not be right to make his citizens suffer because of the foolish Almyran king – cutting ties with Almyra would devastate the economy of the Eastern regions that relied so heavily upon imported goods. Dimitri knew that because of that, he couldn't retaliate against Claude. Dimitri realized with anger that Claude likely knew this as well - there was no way that a clever man such as Claude would have gambled the well-being of his kingdom, even if it meant finally having Byleth on his side.

That was not to say that Claude would not pay for what he did. Dimitri was determined to find a way to punish Claude for his actions while maintaining the peace between their Kingdoms. 

Dimitri understood why Claude did it. They may have been friends, but he could not forget the sideways glances and snide remarks Claude and Edelgard had shared upon learning Byleth had chosen to lead the Blue Lions. And, even in Claude's moment of near despair when he wrote to Dimitri requesting assistance in preventing Derdriu from falling - even then, he had remembered Claude telling Byleth he wished she had chosen him. He recalled the way Claude had looked at her. 

He saw stars as white-hot anger flared inside of him. He could no longer call Claude a friend. He didn't even know if he could reliably call upon him as an ally. Yet, he had to remain civil with him for the good of their people. 

Dimitri folded his arms upon his desk and laid his head down. He calmed himself from his angry state by thinking of the child - the child that was supposed to be his. If the baby turned out to be Claude’s, Dimitri knew it would likely live a difficult life as a bastard. Would Claude have the decency to legitimize the baby? If not, the baby would have to be sent to live at Garreg Mach. How would the people of Fhaergus treat the child if they discovered the truth?

Dimitri sincerely hoped things would never come to that. He prayed to the goddess every night that the child would be his, just as he had told Byleth he would the night she confessed. All he could do now was hope his prayers would be answered.

He lifted himself from his desk and began to pick up the papers he scattered during his earlier outburst. It looked like he was going to be late for the meeting again. That simply would not do. He was the King, and he had a job to do.

\--

The whirlwind of emotions Dimitri had been feeling disappeared into nothingness when a healer fetched him in the middle of the night to alert him that Byleth had gone into labor prematurely. The only thing he could feel upon hearing the news was fear.

He had thought the worst thing that could happen was that Claude would be the father of the baby. But he was wrong. The worst thing that could happen would be for him to lose the baby; or worse, lose the baby and Byleth as well. As much as it hurt, he realized that he'd rather lose his wife and child to Claude than have them die.

He needed to be at Byleth's side. He ran to the infirmary as fast as he could, bursting past the guards as went where he needed to be – with his wife. 

Byleth was laying on the delivery bed, exhausted and clearly in pain. Her hair was scattered everywhere save for the strands that were stuck to the sweat on her forehead. Her eyes, which had been dull, lit up with joy when Dimitri entered the room. Things had been so tense between them that she hadn't known if he would want to be there with her. She managed a small, weak smile for him.

"Hey," he whispered to her, holding her hand within his.

"Dimitri... I am so happy you are here."

"I couldn't let you do this alone. Even if..” He could not bring himself to finish the sentence. Not now.

"This child will be blessed to have you as a father," she said. Despite the pain she was in, she sounded resolute. She, too, had prayed every night for Dimitri to be the baby’s father. Dimitri gently squeezed her hand in response. He sat beside his her, never letting her hand go, as the hours passed by. 

The healthy cries of the child and Byleth's relieved sigh assured him that they would be alright. The happiness of the moment began to settle inside of him. Byleth and the baby were fine.

"It's a boy!" someone exclaimed. Dimitri finally let go of Byleth’s hand.

The child was placed into his arms. He was so small and fragile, Dimitri was afraid he would break him if he dared move a muscle. The midwife-healer gently moved the blanket that was obscuring the boy’s face.

Dimitri’s world shattered when he caught his first glimpse of the baby and saw his messy brown hair and tightly closed eyes. In one smooth motion Dimitri handed the boy to Byleth and ran out of the room so that nobody would witness him sinking into despair.

Somehow, he managed to find his way back to his study before he allowed himself to give in to his sorrow. Once he was alone, his soul was pulled into a darkness so deep, he would need the power of a god to escape. Unfortunately for him, the only god he knew was living inside of the one who cast him into the darkness in the first place.


	7. Fatherhood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The birth of the royal baby is kept a secret by order of the Queen until some answers can be found. However, such a high profile secret cannot be contained forever.

There was no gossip in the palace anymore. No whispers. Only silence.

There was only silence as the queen had commanded the healers to keep the baby's birth a secret. He was born too early, she said. She didn't want anyone to worry, she said.

She was so good at lying now.

\--

After the birth, Dimitri had shut himself away from the world. Not even Dedue could reach out to him. The King had completely succumbed to his internal darkness. The voices of the dead, the voices he had learned to live with, were now screaming at him, calling him a monster for not visiting the child.

He couldn't bring himself to visit the boy. He was afraid. He feared that he would look upon the child and see Claude looking back at him. He was afraid he would see betrayal itself within the face of the child.

The voices would not stop. They pleaded with him to visit the baby. They were relentless. Eventually, he gave in, hoping that just glancing at baby would be enough to silence them.

Five days had passed since the birth when Dimitri finally left his confinement to see the boy. The guards protecting the nursery stepped aside, with surprise, to let Dimitri enter. He walked in slowly, trying to still his racing heart while not disturbing the baby's rest.

The child was napping in his crib, and Dimitri looked upon him with awe as he realized how much the child had changed since birth. He had seen the baby fresh from birth, before he was properly cleaned. Now, he could see the child had a much different appearance.

Dimitri realized that the hair he had thought was dark brown was actually a fairer hue; it reminded him of Byleth's late father, Jeralt. The muddy, reddish skin he saw at birth was now a soft ivory, similar to Byleth. Dimitri worriedly studied the baby's face to see if he could find any trade of Claude. There was none; the boy looked just like his mother.

Dimitri reached out his hand and gently stroked the boy's cheek. Could it be that the goddess answered his prayers? Did the goddess deem a wretch like himself worthy of happiness?

The baby stirred under his cold touch, and Dimitri felt his heart lurch from the sensation.

There was something there. He felt it. There was a bond between him and the baby. Dimitri leaned forward into the crib and lifted the baby in his arms. Peace overcame him as he held the child - his child, he hoped.

He heard a loud gasp from the doorway as he turned to see his wife standing there with her mouth open in shock. She stood there watching him for a few moments, trying to think of something to say.

"Dimitri! I am so happy to see you with him. I have been so worried about you," she exclaimed.

"He looks... different.." was all he could say to her.

She knew what Dimitri had thought. She had thought the same thing at first. Only after the midwife tended to the baby did she realize the truth, but Dimitri had already fled by that point. Byleth had realized her only option was to wait for Dimitri to realize the truth on his own terms.

And now, Dimitri was finally here. The baby stirred again, slowly opening his eyes. He looked at Dimitri with a confused expression, wondering who the familiar voice he was hearing belonged too.

Dimitri's heart soared as the baby's eyes met his. There was no mistaking it now. The baby's eyes were a vivid blue color, as vibrant as the daytime sky. The exact match of the eyes they peered into.

The darkness in his soul began to disappear. Everything bad within him began to fade away, replaced now with love - love for his infant son, whose existence he had prayed over for many nights.

Tears filled his eyes as he held the baby in his arms. Dimitri clutched the boy close to his heart. His son was the most precious thing in the world. 

"He's beautiful," he said firmly.

Byleth began to feel tears in her eyes as well. Despite all of her poor choices, nothing could rob of her of the joy she felt at this moment. 

"I've been waiting for you to return. He needs a name," Byleth whispered. "I wanted to give his father the honor of naming him."

"In Fhaergus, we have a tradition of naming children after those we honor. I've always wanted to name my firstborn son after my father. Lambert."

Byleth nodded.

"Lambert Gustav Blaiddyd. Named after the late king, and a knight I once admired."

"It's perfect."

Dimitri did not want to put the baby down. Insistent upon making up for the five days he lost out on, he held Lambert in his arms as he napped instead of placing him back in his crib.

Byleth tentatively reached out and placed her arm on her husband's shoulder, wondering how he would react to the touch. He did not pull away. Rather, he smiled at her. She felt the entire world brighten from his smile. She decided it was time to ask Dimitri the question that had been heavy upon her mind for months.

"What will become of us, Dimitri?" she asked.

His smile dropped. But, finally, after months of avoiding the topic, Dimitri did not walk away from the conversation. Instead, he looked her dead in the eye and made no attempt to hide the lingering pain he still felt.

"You have no idea what you put me through these last few months."

"Dimitri.." She tried to call out to him, but he continued to speak.

"You've hurt me. I am not ready to talk about our relationship yet. We need to focus on being present for our son. We need to focus on being a family."

Dimitri was right; as broken as they were, their son had to be their top priority.

Their marriage would heal eventually. It would be hard, but the love between them was still present. It was weak, but still there.

\--

In the early hours of the morning, a lone messenger ran as fast as he could to deliver some news to his King. The messenger was received discreetly, in a meeting place far removed from the capital.

"Your Excellency," the messenger said between heavy breaths, "I have received an interesting report."

"Do tell; you know I love secrets," replied the King with a wink.

"I received word that the Queen of Fhaergus delivered a baby boy a few nights ago."

The King frowned. "How does that concern me?"

"I thought it might interest you to know that the couple is trying to keep the baby a secret. The birth has not been officially announced yet."

The King rubbed his chin, considering why such a thing would be kept a secret. He began calculating dates in his head.

"Gossipmongers within the palace claim the baby is the first member of House Blaiddyd in nearly a century to be born brown of hair. I have yet to confirm this, however."

Upon hearing this, the King put his thoughts on pause and looked at his messenger with a sly smile. "Brown hair, you say?"

It seemed his scheme had some unintended consequences.

\--

Two weeks after the birth, after a particularly tense discussion regarding Lambert, the King and Queen decided it would be best to have the baby tested for a Crest.

While both of them were fairly positive that the baby was Dimitri's, it was still worth noting that the baby did not resemble him much. The only sign of the father was the fact that the baby had Dimitri's eyes - but Byleth once had a similar eye color. Nothing could be for certain.

Nothing, except for a Crest.

As a tactician, Byleth had considered every possible outcome of the test. If the baby had no Crest, or the Crest of Flames, the father could never be proven. Byleth was very worried about this, but surprisingly Dimitri did not seemed concerned. He insisted that the boy was his - after all, the baby bore his father's name.

If for some reason Lambert had the crest of Riegan... everything between her and Dimitri would end. She did not believe that was possible due to the baby's appearance, but she still had an unsettled fear deep within her that somehow, the baby would bear Claude's crest. That was a fear that she did not disclose to Dimitri.

She desperately hoped that the baby had Dimitri's crest. He deserved that much for all of his suffering. He deserved a son that would carry on his royal bloodline. Byleth wanted nothing more than to give that to him.

The next night, Dedue was sent out to covertly escort an esteemed guest to the palace. Not a single pair of eyes noticed as their guest was led carefully led through hidden passages within the palace and into the nursery where the king and queen stood waiting for the arrival.

"It's so good to see you again, Professor Hanneman," Dimitri said warmly as the door behind him was sealed by Dedue, who stood guard outside.

"Oh please, the honor is all mine, Your Majesty. I am honored you would select me for such an important event," replied the scholar.

"There is no one better we can trust with this," Byleth added.

The couple parted, allowing the man access to their heavily guarded secret. As Hanneman peered into the crib, Lambert, who was wide awake, gave a small cry of confusion.

"I promise this will not hurt at all," he said as he fastened a small machine over the baby. 

After a few moments, Hanneman gasped. "I don't believe it," he muttered.

The couple looked at each other in fear over Hanneman's discovery.

"Your son possesses a major crest of Blaiddyd! This is incredible! There has not been a major bearer of this Crest since before the Kingdom's founding! I wonder if this has any influence from the Crest of Flames? Oh, I must do further research-"

Dimitri ignored Hanneman's scholarly rant and approached the crib as Hanneman continued talking. He lifted Lambert up and out of the complicated machinery to cradle him in his arms. This was undisputedly his son; the bloodline of House Blaiddyd ran strong within him. There was no doubt that he would become the next King of Fhaergus. A great and strong King, at that!

"You must be proud," remarked Hanneman, finishing his tirade.

"I have never been prouder," Dimitri responded as he smiled upon his son's face.

He was ready to share with the world how proud he was. He turned to his wife, who stood at his side, smiling radiantly from the Crest revelation. "I think the time has come to introduce our son to the Kingdom."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So who fell for that plot twist? I think I saw at least two commenters that called it. Statistically speaking, this outcome was the most likely one.


	8. Punishment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The royal couple officially introduces Lambert to the Kingdom. Things get interesting when a foreign visitor shows up to give his regards to the infant prince.

The Kingdom knew nothing but happiness the day Prince Lambert's birth was announced. The King and Queen were radiant with joy as they planned a great feast in honor of their son. It was at this feast that the young prince was to make his first public appearance at the tender age of 2 months.

Everyone was ecstatic to lay eyes upon the infant prince. At birth, he looked a lot like Byleth, but as he grew it became more and more obvious that he resembled his father, Dimitri. Save for his sandy brown hair, he also took after his namesake grandfather.

Close friends of the couple were allowed to see the baby before the general public. Ashe and Annette, who gave birth to a son a few months prior to Lambert's birth excitedly chatted away about their son's "new playmate", much to the happiness of Dimitri. He had many fond memories of his childhood friends that he had known since birth, and was excited for the prospect for his son to share in that feeling as well.

Seteth and Flayn arrived on behalf of the Church of Seiros. Seteth was relieved to see how much the child resembled Dimitri, and remarked how he would grow up to become a great king. Flayn thought that the baby was the cutest thing she had ever seen and did not want to let little Lambert go after Byleth had allowed her to hold him. She muttered something to Byleth about having "baby fever", which caused Seteth to pry the infant from her arms and return him to his parents.

Lord Fraldarius and Margrave Gautier both came to give their regards, as was expected of the two highest ranked nobles in the Kingdom. Felix did not outwardly express any feelings about the baby, but Byleth swore she saw a hint of a smile on his face when Lambert giggled at him. Sylvain, on the other hand, fell in love with the little one and kept looking over at Ingrid (who was nearby on guard duty as one of Dimitri's knights) as he talked about how many kids he planned on having. Ingrid rolled her eyes at him but made no attempt to hide her smile.

The other Blue Lions and Hilda (who was an honorary Blue Lion at that point) could not make it but sent their regards to their King. While their absence was felt, it did not retract from the absolute bliss that radiated through the Kingdom.

\--

Claude sat atop his white wyvern, hidden from view, as he watched people come and go from the palace in Fhirdiad. He noticed that although there were more guards posted than usual, they seemed to be letting everyone in to see the baby. He decided to make the trip to Fodlan alone so that he would not draw attention to himself. He knew that he’d be able to enter the palace undetected if he did so alone.

He was not invited nor informed about the event, which hurt him more than he cared to admit. He only discovered it from intel he had received from his messengers.

He had a lot of information at his disposal. He knew the baby was not his. While a part of him initially wished the child could be his, he knew that would have just made things complicated. His scheme didn't need to involve another life. Ultimately, he was relieved the baby was not his.

Despite all the information he had, none of it proved useful to him. The answers to the questions he still had could not be found.

That was why he came today - he needed to find those answers. And maybe this time, his scheme would not go too far, as it had months ago.

\--

Dimitri and Byleth sat on their thrones, with Prince Lambert happily playing in his mother's arms, when the room fell silent. Nobody had expected the King of Almyra to show up during the public showing. Everyone knew Claude and Dimitri were friends – so why did he not arrive earlier during the more intimate gathering? And why was he alone? His actions drew whispers from the crowd Ashe walked past everyone.

As Claude approached them, Byleth felt her heart face as she saw Dimitri's lips press firm with anger. She hoped he would have the decency to keep up with appearances - especially in front of everyone. She heard Dedue, who was carefully positioned behind Dimitri, grasp his axe firmly.

"What are you doing here?" Dimitri asked. He forced himself to smile.

"I came to see the Prince, of course. I hear he gets his good looks from his mother."

Lambert giggled in his mother's arms as he peered at the strange, ornate man that stood in front of him.

Dimitri gripped the arms of the throne to prevent his anger from slipping through his regal facade. "Yes, I am happy that you want to meet our pride and joy. Prince Lambert will grow up to be a strong king. He is a bearer of a major Crest of Blaiddyd, after all. He could pose a threat to Almyra if you aren't careful.” He sounded like he was teasing Claude, but Byleth knew it was a real threat.

If the threat had any impact on Claude, he didn't show it. In fact, he did not seem to be too concerned with the baby at all. Byleth sized him up, trying to read his body language, but it was no use. She could not tell what his intentions were.

"I am sure the little Prince will grow up to be quite fearsome, like his father," Claude responded diplomatically. "But, alas, he will be no match for me, the mighty king of Almyra."

It was a joke, of course. But Dimitri, warped by his anger, did not take it that way. Byleth could feel the rage emanating from him. "I wouldn't be so sure about that, Claude. If memory serves me right, you lost to me during all of our mock battles as students. My son will only become stronger, especially considering the power of his mother.”

Claude frowned as he glanced at Byleth. It seemed Dimitri struck a nerve. "Please, you only won because of Teach."

Byleth hugged Lambert close to her to try and shield her embarrassment. They were squabbling like schoolchildren right now. Normally, Dimitri would be above such antics, but she knew why he was choosing to pick this fight with Claude. It was her fault.

Claude continued. "I'm sure if we battled it out with just the two of us, I'd be able to secure the win easily," he said with his trademark smile - his trademark smile that was known for not reaching his eyes.

Dimitri stood up. "Are you challenging me, Claude?"

Byleth closed her eyes in a silent prayer to Sothis that they were not about to start fighting. The throne room erupted in cheers; of course they would find a duel between two fearsome monarchs to be entertaining. 

"Only if you really think you can win, Your Majesty,” Claude answered sarcastically. “If so, I ought to show you how wrong you are.”

Dimitri walked away from his wife and son and towards the foreign King. "Follow me then," he said as he walked right past Claude and towards the palace's largest courtyard. Dedue followed closely behind him. Claude did as well.

Everyone scrambled after them to get a glimpse of the action. Byleth sank further into her seat as her son watched the crowd leave the room. His big blue eyes blinked with curiosity as he looked as his mother, seemingly asking her to take him outside.

Byleth sighed as she whispered to her son, “I hope your father isn't about to make a fool of himself.”

\--

As they stood in the armory selecting their training weapons, Claude wondered if Byleth had told Dimitri about what happened between them. He didn't think she would, if she was still anything like how she was back at Garreg Mach. Claude could not tell if the duel was in response to his egotistical comments in the throne room or in response to _other_ matters.

He turned his head to look at the King, who was smiling softly as he rubbed his hand along some training lances. He seemed at ease. Dimitri did not seem angry. Could it be possible that she didn't tell him?

Claude turned back to admire an axe that caught his eye. As he rubbed his fingers across the sharp metal, he felt something at his back. Slowly and carefully, he turned around again.

Dimitri stood in front of him with a lance pointed inches from his face - the lance he held was most definitely _not_ a training lance. "Maybe we should use real weapons instead," he said darkly.

In that moment, Claude got the answer he was looking for. Byleth told Dimitri about what happened. Of course she did. He felt foolish for thinking she wouldn't. He felt foolish for thinking Byleth would ever give him a second chance. She chose Dimitri – and continued to choose him. 

"Well, that would certainly up the ante," Claude replied, keeping his tone casual. "But I think it would be difficult to rule your kingdom with two eyepatches, wouldn't it?"

"Keep your stupid taunts to the battlefield, Claude." Dimitri narrowed his eye. "Then again, you don't seem to be very good at keeping things where they belong."

Claude felt an unfamiliar feeling tug at his chest. He had not planned for this to happen. He thought-

No. He realized it didn't matter what he thought. He made a mistake; he miscalculated his odds. He was at Dimitri's mercy now, and Dimitri was going to make him pay for what he did.

\--

The two walked out onto the courtyard with their weapons in hand. Thankfully, Dimitri had enough sense not follow through with his threat of using real weapons. Claude chose to wield a sword while Dimitri stayed with his usual lance. Both were highly proficient with their chosen weapons, though Claude would have felt more comfortable wielding a bow. Still, he felt confident he could put up a good fight against his rival.

Byleth watched nervously as the two men prepared to battle. The kings honorably crossed weapons for a moment before turning away to begin their duel. As Byleth had anticipated, Claude took up a defensive position while Dimitri circled him as a predator would circle it's prey. He struck at Claude careful, calculated jabs of his lance. Claude dodged or deflected each of his strikes.

They were evenly matched for the moment. Byleth's many years of combat experience made that easy to see. But Dimitri was far less stable than Claude. Surely, she knew someone as adept as Claude would pick up on this. The right words could push Dimitri over the edge and cause his precise jabs to become wild hits - giving Claude the advantage he needed. Byleth knew it was only a matter of time.

The two moved around in circles, resembling dance partners more so than combatants. They were both highly skilled. The crowd cheered for their King, and yelled with gusto whenever Dimitri landed a blow.

"So, is it time for taunts yet?" Claude asked as he used his sword to deflect yet another calculated hit.

He knew exactly what he was doing. Dimitri took a wide swing at his head, which Claude dodged with ease. The effect did not last long, though. Dimitri returned to his precise jabs, striking Claude when he had the chance. After a while, he was starting to learn Claude's movements and began to get more hits in.

"What's the matter, Claude?" Dimitri countered. "You look like you are starting to sweat."

Claude knew he would have to act soon if he wanted to beat Dimitri. The hits he was taking were starting to make him sore, and the cheering of the crowd was starting to become discouraging. It reminded him of his younger days, when people would pick fights with him for-

No. None of that mattered now. He had to break Dimitri's focus. He had to hit him where he knew it would hurt.

"The only one here capable of making me sweat is your wife."

He winked at Dimitri and readied himself for what was to come.

The crowd gasped. Of course, to them, the comment sounded like Claude was merely acting inappropriately to gain the advantage. Which was true, to an extent - but Byleth knew the hidden meaning deep in his words. Dimitri would no doubt catch it as well.

Claude's plan worked. Dimitri gave an angry grunt as he madly swung his lance around. Claude had to work a bit to dodge, and he collected a few scrapes along the way, but he was pushing Dimitri exactly where he needed him to be.

Claude took his opening and used a deft swing of his sword to hit Dimitri across his knuckles, causing him to drop the lance. He quickly stepped forward to place his body weight upon the fallen lance so that Dimitri could not retrieve it.

He looked up at Dimitri defiantly, inches from the King's face, as he prepared to gloat in his victory. He had disarmed the King of Fhaergus. 

Dimitri stared back at the Almyran King. Claude's raunchy taunt had incited his animalistic rage; Dimitri felt himself slip completely into his anger. Without warning, he punched Claude across the jaw, sending him tumbling backwards. The training sword he held was sent flying a few feet away.

There was no point in this now. Claude was more skilled at handling weapons, but he could not match Dimitri's strength. He knew he could not best the King of Fhaergus in hand-to-hand combat. All he could do was rely on his speed and dodge him until Dimitri gave up.

Nothing was held back now. Dimitri's anger was on full display as he charged to attack again. Claude, still recovering from the first hit, did not have enough time to react.

With a yell of pure rage, Dimitri swung himself forward and punched Claude square in the face. The impact was so heavy, it could be heard through the crowd. The hit sent Claude flying as the crowd roared.

The noise became too much for young Lambert, who began crying out of fear. His mother tried to comfort him, but his cries were so loud that the entire courtyard could hear him.

Dimitri was pulled from his angered state by the sounds of his son. He realized that he had taken things too far as he looked at his rival lying upon the ground with blood dripping from his mouth. His son had seen everything. His baby would realize how monstrous his father was.

Without a word to Claude, Dimitri walked towards his wife and reached for his crying son. "There now, everything is going to be alright," he whispered to him. Lambert's cries began to soften. His father's presence comforted him. Despite what Dimitri thought, Lambert did not think his father was a monster.

He did not meet his wife's eyes as he took his son in his arms and walked away, leaving behind a mass of shocked spectators. They began whispering wildly.

Byleth pulled Dedue aside before he could follow Dimitri out of the courtyard. "Dedue, I want to speak to Claude and I need you as my witness. Please." 

He looked at her coldly, remembering the hurt she caused His Majesty. He took her betrayal of Dimitri personally, and Byleth could not blame him for it. Dedue did not want to do her any favors, but knew it was best to accompany her in case anything was to happen. He walked behind Byleth as she made her way to Claude.

Byleth struggled to conceal her anger as the last of the spectators began to leave the courtyard. Part of her felt bad for Claude – Dimitri really did a number on him. Another part of her, however, knew he deserved it.

"Why have you come here," she demanded as Claude looked up at her from the ground.

"Oh, and here I thought you would be happy to see me." Even in pain, Claude was still Claude.

"Stop. You knew I wouldn't feel that way. You know I won't make the same mistake twice."

"A mistake, huh?" Claude had the audacity to look hurt.

"Don't look at me like that. I don't know what kind of game you are playing, Claude, but I want out."

"It isn't a game." He sounded sincere. Truly sincere. Dedue tensed next to Byleth, no doubt ready to pick up from where Dimitri had left off.

Byleth stared at him with narrowed eyes. "I suppose it doesn't matter what your intentions were. Not to me, anyway." She sighed and offered him a hand to lift him up off the ground. "I can't be fully angry with you because this was my fault, too. And for what it's worth, I am sorry for this."

He looked like he wanted to say something, but Byleth didn't let him. She pulled him up from the ground as she chastised him.

"You should have known not to come," she continued. "You should have known I would tell him."

Claude gazed at her sadly as he wiped the blood off of his face. He had never stopped to realize how his actions would affect Dimitri. He only thought of himself - as always.

He only saw Dimitri as an obstacle to get that which he desired. He saw him as an object when he should have been seen as a friend.

Maybe it wasn't too late to try and make things right again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright you guys, don't hate me for this chapter. Dimitri has a right to be angry with Claude. I did not write this with the intention of hating on Claude and it should be obvious I am going to give his character the attention he deserves.


	9. Atonement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claude reflects on his actions and engages in a heated discussion with Dimitri, where he reveals the underlying causes of his actions.

Before Byleth left the courtyard to find Dimitri, she managed to flag down a healer to tend to Claude. He was touched she at least had the decency to do that for him. It was the least she could do; after all, this was partially her fault. At least she could admit that to him. 

Claude rubbed his jaw where the stinging pain of Dimitri’s fist still lingered. He certainly deserved that after everything he had said to him. He regretted acting the way he did during the duel. Ignoring the underlying situation, his pride would not allow him to lose. He was representing his Kingdom, after all.

He never meant for things to go as far as they did – with the battle and with what happened the night of the reunion. All Claude wanted was Byleth’s guidance. He wanted her to help him achieve his dreams. He wanted what he never had in his youth.

When she smiled at him, it began. When she told him she was proud of him, it had gone too far. When he heard that, he felt things he had never felt before. He felt appreciated. Loved. He felt the support that Dimitri had been given for so long. He stupidly pushed his dreams aside for one night with her. He risked everything he had worked for just to feel the emotional high that came with what they shared.

Ultimately, it wasn’t even about her. It was about her power. Claude had always been drawn to the high degree of authority Byleth carried herself with. He let his curiosity get the better of him. He should not have acted on it, but he did. Claude was disgusted with himself.

Claude groaned as the healers mended his wounds. He had grown so much, and yet, he was still the same. Though years had passed, he was still the same boy from years ago - a lonely outsider with nobody to turn to.

\--

After spending time with his son and putting him down for a nap, Dimitri hid himself away in his study as he braced for the public relations crisis that was inevitably going to happen as a result of his brawl with the King of Almyra. Byleth had assured him that she would take care of it, but Dimitri wasn't sure if he could fully trust her. Not yet, anyway.

He did not make much progress in his endeavor, however, because he was still dealing the emotions that were stirred up from the duel. Dimitri was still dealing with juggling the pain of Byleth’s betrayal with the joy of Lambert’s birth – the fight with Claude was the last thing he needed. 

A knock on the door disrupted him from his thoughts. A gentle, concerned voice called from behind the locked doors. "Your Majesty, may I enter?"

It was Dedue, checking on him, as to be expected given the circumstances. Dimitri allowed him entry.  
"Your Majesty, how are you feeling?" he asked.

"I don't know,” he replied honestly. “I appreciate your concern, though.”

He nodded. "Of course. I came here to check on you, but also, to deliver a message. Claude wishes to speak with you."

Just hearing that name caused a flare of anger to rise in Dimitri's chest. "Why would you think I'd want to speak to him?"

"Your Majesty, you know I have always acted in your best interest. I think it may be beneficial for you to hear what he was to say."

Dimitri shook his head aggressively. He didn't want to speak to Claude. However, he trusted Dedue – more so than anyone else after his wife's betrayal. If Dedue thought this would help him, surely, he should oblige.

"If you think it best, then I suppose will listen to what he has to say. But you had better stand guard outside in case I need you to throw him out. I don’t want a repeat of what happened earlier.”

"Understood. I will bring him in."

Claude walked in, though he did not seem like himself at all. His normally confident posture was now slouched and guarded. He was rightfully wary of Dimitri. He entered the room but stood near the door in case the King of Fhaergus decided to make a move towards him. Dimitri couldn't help but feel guilty at Claude's appearance. He sported a busted lip, and it was easy to see a bruise forming on his jaw where the first hit had landed. Still, Dimitri’s guilt could not measure up against the anger and hurt he felt upon seeing Claude again.

"Hey, before you start attacking me again, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry.” Claude raised his arms in a defensive position, likely knowing his words would not do him any good.

"You think saying sorry is enough? You show up after years of silence, walk in here as the King of Almyra, and seduce my wife? In what world do you think saying sorry is enough?"

Claude winced at Dimitri's harsh words. When put so bluntly, he realized how horrible his actions sounded. "I came here to offer an explanation. I figured I owe you that much."

"I don't know how you could ever explain this," Dimitri muttered.

"Look, Dimitri. You don't have to believe me. If our roles were reversed, I probably wouldn't believe you, either. But what happened that night... I didn't want it to go that far. I really didn't. I just wanted her to be with me. And not in _that_ way. I wanted her guidance and support."

Dimitri stared at him blankly. "Go on."

"We all saw what she did for you. And I’m not just talking about her physical power, either. She changed you. You were on the brink of destroying yourself when I saw you at Gronder Field. I saw Teach with you, and how she looked at you, and-”

Claude paused, trying to find the right words. Dimitri sized him up, looking for any indication that what he was hearing was a lie. There was no mischievous twinkle in Claude’s eyes, no false smile on his face. It seemed like Claude was speaking from his heart. 

"All I wanted was for someone to be there for me like she was for you." 

Dimitri crossed his arms and stared at his rival with his lone eye, pondering the man's words. He considered his response carefully. "If this is true, why didn't you just tell us? Tell me? I would have been there for you. Part of the reason this all hurt so much was because it was you. I thought we were friends, Claude." The anger in his voice gave way to the hurt he felt; its impact was not lost on Claude, who frowned in response.

"I never realized you felt that way. I... I'm sorry."

“What kind of person does such a thing to a friend?” Dimitri asked incredulously.

"If it is any consolation, I never really knew friendship growing up. If it isn’t obvious, I am only half Almyran. My mother is from Fodlan. People from Fodlan – people like us – are disliked in Almyra; my mother and I are no exception. Many people made their distaste for me clear while I was growing up. I may be their King now, but many of the older, more traditional Almyrans still hate me. I am hated to the point that some people actively wish death upon me. I have survived multiple assassination attempts starting as early as I could remember. I learned from a very young age that trusting someone meant receiving a knife to your back. Eventually, I began to assume that everyone else was like me, too – distrusting and manipulative. But not you, Dimitri. You never were like me. You've always been just and kind, even at your lowest point. I should have been able to see that you truly were reaching out your hand to me in friendship the day you came to my aid in Derdriu. But I didn't. And for that, I am sorry. I took the friendship I did not realize I had for granted."

“Hmph,” was all Dimitri could muster in response.

"There is more. Despite how things may seem, I did not come here to manipulate you the night of the class reunion. That letter I sent you was sent with good intentions. I truly did wish to see everyone again. But once I saw everyone together, I felt jealous. I am sure you are aware that Edelgard and I were both jealous that Teach chose you back then, during our Academy days."

Dimitri nodded. “Yes, the resentment was obvious.”

"Right. Well, this time, I wasn't just jealous of you and Teach. Seeing your whole class that day, safe and happy... I can't even describe how I felt that night. I was hurting. I lost everyone in that war. Nearly everyone in my house was outright killed or indirectly died due to the war. You have no idea how lucky you are, Dimitri, to have all of your classmates by your side."

Dimitri threw up his arms in anger, ready to explode at Claude. "Are you implying that I am lucky because I haven't lost anyone I care about? Claude, you have no idea what I have gone through. I've lost everything. Your classmates were my friends too! Did you forget that? I lost them too… and more. So much more." He angrily pointed a finger at Claude as his skin burned red with rage. "You must have lost the last remnants of your mind if you think you can come in here and tell me this after everything you have done!" He was yelling now, not caring who heard him.

His shouting caused Dedue to open the door to check on the pair. He narrowed his eyes at Claude as he rolled up his sleeves, preparing himself in case he needed to use physical force to remove him from the room.

"You don't get it, Dimitri!" Claude shouted back, baring his anger as well. "I am not saying you haven't been through a lot. You have. But every time you fell, you had someone there to help you lift yourself back up. I never had any of that. I've been alone. My fellow housemates were the closet things I ever had to friends - and now they are all dead. I may still have my parents, yes, but they never gave me the support I needed. After my first assassination attempt, my father told me to 'get used to it'. I was seven years old. I was seven years old and learning how to defend myself against trained assassins. But it wasn't like that for you, huh? You had a bunch of knights on your side to protect you. You had your friends. And Teach. You had everything I never did.”

Claude stopped yelling momentarily to catch his breath. He was not thinking anymore, not scheming anymore. The words he spoke were tumbling out of his mouth, raw and unpolished. He continued his rant.

"You weren't yourself at Gronder Field. You killed without hesitation. You led your friends down a dark path. And they followed you! I could never inspire that much loyalty in my classmates, as much as I tried. I was always the outsider; I had to work so hard to gain just a fraction of the respect that you had – respect that you took for granted. I never had the luxury of falling into darkness like you did. I would have been cut down instantly.”

Dedue moved forward to stand in front of Dimitri, who was glaring at Claude, ready to pounce. "Claude," Dedue warned. "Watch yourself.”

Dimitri placed his hand on Dedue's arm. "Let him finish."

"I'm sorry Dimitri, but if we are baring everything, you need to know this, too. That night with Teach, before-" he paused to choose his words carefully “-before things got out of hand, we had a conversation about my classmates and the choices I made as leader of the Golden Deer. She told me that she was proud of me. Nobody has ever told me that before – not in the way she had. She was the first person to look past my fancy titles and see the real me. She was proud of who I am inside. It meant the world to me to hear her say those things. I was overwhelmed by my emotions that night and I took it too far. Both she and I made a mistake. And, I don't know if she told you this, but after it happened, she immediately told me that she regretted it and ran away. She ran back to you."

Everything Claude had said before made Dimitri want nothing more than to push Dedue aside and strike him across the face. But this new revelation sent an icy shock through him, freezing him in his place. Many times, Byleth had tried to tell him exactly what happened that night, but he never wanted to hear it. He thought it would hurt too much.  
But now, hearing it from Claude's mouth, the truth did not hurt as much as he feared. In a way, it was liberating.

"I see," Dimitri said. He stepped out from behind Dedue so that he was in full view of Claude. He folded his arms and looked at his rival quizzically. "Let me ask you this – what do you hope to gain by telling me all of this?"

"Nothing. I just wanted you to know the truth.”

Dimitri shook his head. "If you are telling me this in hopes of making me feel better about what happened, you wasted your breath. All I feel now is regret – regret that one of my friends was suffering so greatly and I could not see it. Regret that I could not help you before you decided to destroy me; or rather, attempt to destroy me.”

Dimitri narrowed his eyes at Claude as he continued. "I understand your pain. I know it almost as well as I know my own. What I don't understand is why you never stopped to think about the consequences of your actions. Did you even realize there was a chance that my son could have been yours? Do you realize what that would have done to me? Do you realize what that would have meant for our Kingdoms? Wars have started over this kind of thing, Claude!”

Claude attempted to apologize again, but Dimitri wasn’t having it. He continued speaking.

“You will never understand how much pain I endured because of what you did. I spent every night praying that her child would be mine. And I am eternally grateful that he is. You almost destroyed me. Why must your pain be reflected on me, Claude? We could have shared our pain and helped each other. Now, all we have done was add to each other’s wounds. We hurt each other when we should have been healing each other.”

Claude hung his head in shame, averting his gaze from Dimitri. "I should have realized sooner that it wasn’t Teach that I needed. I needed someone I could lean on for support. All along, all I needed was a friend like you. I needed _you_."

Dimitri looked at him scornfully. "I am not the man I once was. The man I used to be would have killed you on sight, knowing what you did. But the man I am now will not. I have learned that to be respected as King, I must separate my emotions from my actions. I can never forgive you for what you have done. I can no longer call you my friend. But, despite everything, I still wish for you to remain my ally."

Claude lifted his head to meet Dimitri's gaze once again and lifted an eyebrow at him. "Truly?"

Dimitri offered him a sad smile, though it did not mask the sadness that he still harbored within. “Our Kingdoms need the support of each other to thrive. Whether I like it or not, I need you, too."

\--

Claude turned back to look at the palace of Fhirdiad one last time as he flew back to Almyra. The evening sun was just beginning to dip into the western sky, turning the magnificent palace into a mere silhouette. Claude did not know when he would be back again. It would probably be a while; he caused a lot of damage and it was only right that he left the royal couple alone to heal.

What he did was wrong. He knew that. Byleth had been wrong, too, and it was up to her to decide how she should atone for her sins. He had atoned for his; each blow of Dimitri’s fists upon his face and each blow of Dimitri’s words upon his soul was punishment enough.

Up until now, he had been so focused on trying to gain the things he did not have that he never stopped to appreciate the things he did have. There _were_ people that cared for him; he was just too focused on himself and his dreams to pay them mind.

He had Nader, his combat instructor. When Claude was a child, Nader saved his life countless times and taught him how to protect himself against his assassins. Over time, Nader proved to be more of a father figure to Claude than his actual one was.

There was also Judith. When Claude first left Almyra to join the Leicester Alliance as the heir to House Riegan after his uncle’s death, things had been tough. Many times, it seemed as if the entire country was against him. But not Judith. Her entire House had been spurned by the politics of the Alliance, and naturally, the two allied together. That is what Claude thought their relationship was, anyway – allies. But now, he remembered distinctly how hard she had fought at the Battle of Derdriu. She fought for him; she cared for him. And all he did was give everything away and leave her behind.

And then there was Hilda, the sole remaining member of the Golden Deer house. She was the last link to his days at Garreg Mach. She was a living reminder of the happier days they shared as students; days when the Golden Deer were all alive and together. Claude remembered how she had chastised him at their reunion for not writing to her. At first, he thought she was just acting her usual self and pretending to be hurt for attention and sympathy. Now, he was realizing that maybe she had truly been hurt by his silence. 

Hilda had considered him a friend all this time. And, just like Judith, he left her. Hilda fought for him at Gronder, and even had to retreat after sustaining a massive injury. Hilda risked her life for him at the Battle of Derdriu. Claude had thought she did it only because he asked it of her. But that wasn’t true at all; she could have said no at any point. She could have returned to her home. But she didn’t. She fought for him. She fought for him, and he couldn’t even spare her a moment of his time to write her a letter. One measly letter.

As he headed back to Almyra, Claude pulled on the reigns of his wyvern, signaling the beast to descend. It seemed he had a couple of stops to make before he could return home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew. I didn't think I'd get this chapter out in time, but here it is. I apologize if it has more grammar errors than normal.


	10. Epilogue

"Things will never be the same between us. It may be better this way. Before, I was so reliant on you. You were my reason for happiness; my reason to keep going. Now, everything that has happened between us has led me to realize how unhealthy that was. I see now that I must rely on myself for happiness. Not you."

The words constantly replayed themselves in her head, hurting her each time she heard them. After months of trying to get an answer from him, Dimitri was finally able to speak of their relationship one night as the two laid beside each other in bed.

His reply to her caused her to fall asleep with tears, and wake up next to an empty bed.

She didn't bother to go searching for him. He needed to heal. He needed to heal _without_ her. For some reason, that hurt her more than anything.

She walked out of her bedroom and stood on the balcony overlooking the city of Fhirdiad. She used to love looking upon the city and reminding herself of the peace she and Dimitri worked so hard to achieve. Now, she didn't know how she was supposed to feel as she gazed upon the kingdom.

"What a mess you have made of things."

Byleth jumped, wondering who could possibly be speaking with her in such a location. 

She turned around, preparing herself for anything. But there was nobody there.

"Ah! You are acting afraid again. I thought you had gotten used to me!”

No. It couldn't be.

"But it is. Have you forgotten me? Our souls are now bound so deeply, I assumed you have just accepted me as part of you."

“I've missed you," was all Byleth could say to her.

"Yes, clearly. Look at what you've done. I thought for sure that this path was the right one. And now you’ve messed it up.”

Byleth did not respond. She didn't need too. She knew Sothis could feel her shame.

"No matter what you decide, it seems that someone will always suffer, hm? You tried choosing both, and all you did was hurt both. You tried to help, but now you have become the villain of your own story."

If only there as a way to save both of them. Maybe there was even a way she could save all three of them: Dimitri, Claude, and Edelgard. The night of the reunion, she had been telling the truth when she told Claude she believed he was the one who needed her the least. Claude, in response, told her she was wrong. It took her a while to realize it, but Claude was correct. In his own way, he was just as broken as Dimitri and Edelgard.

Three houses. Three leaders. Three broken children.

"Have you not learned anything at all?" Sothis shrieked from within the deepest folds of her soul. "How many times must you go back until you realize you can't save all of them?"

Byleth furrowed her brow, trying to make sense of the words she was hearing. None of Sothis' words made sense.

Except, they did. As the memories came back to her, the words made their meaning clear.

She saw herself, smiling at a baby boy as she cradled him in her arms. His hair was as bright as the midday sun burning against the sky. She tried to focus on the boy, but her vision faded to a view of a lush landscape filled with wyverns and dragons alike. One of the airborne wyverns dipped lower to the ground, flying close to Byleth. She could see the rider commanding the wyvern - a young woman with dark skin and proud brown eyes. She waved her hand and spoke to Byleth; however, the meaning of her words was lost. Her tongue was unfamiliar - what she spoke was not a language of Fodlan. The woman pulled back on her beast and drew her bow, which glowed red with power as she fired an arrow at Byleth. She closed her eyes and felt the arrow pierce her heart.

There was no pain. She opened her eyes, and everything was different. She now stood in a tattered throne room, wielding a sword against a white-haired woman with amethyst eyes and an unbreakable spirit. She wept openly as Byleth's sword tore through her flesh, but her tears were not shed due to physical pain. As the woman fell, Byleth saw a young girl with hair and eyes of bright green crying as she ran to kneel on the ground beside the fallen woman. Byleth reached out a hand - a hand that did not feel like hers - and stroked the girl's cheek. As she ran her thumb across the smooth flesh, a trail of blood was left in its path.

The flood of emotions tied to the memories brought her to tears. She couldn't remember everything, but she could feel it all. "What does it mean?" Byleth asked.

"The more memories we make, the more damaged we become," Sothis responded somberly.

Byleth wanted to ask her what she meant by that. But she didn't need to. She understood it.

That night with Claude, Byleth thought she was being offered a second choice. How wrong she was. Everything about that night had been so wrong. That night wasn't a second choice. It was a choice she had made many times before. A choice of which she still did not know the answer.

Her heart flared as Sothis spoke the words she did not think she was ready to accept. "It seems this is not the path we walk."

She lifted up her hand and stared down at the ring upon her finger. She made a vow to Dimitri. She had broken that vow. But this wasn't the first time she had made such a promise. And this wasn't the first time she had broken such a promise, either.

She thought of her son, Lambert, with his bright blue eyes and sandy brown hair. Her lip quivered as she recalled how much he resembled Jeralt. Out of all of them, he would be the youngest that was left behind. Her heart felt heavy at the thought. She wanted to run and see him one last time, but she knew if she did that, it would be too hard to let go. She knew from experience that this was always the hardest part. 

She lifted up her hand and channeled a power that had laid dormant for years, readying itself for the moment she would inevitably call upon it one last time. The ring on her finger glowed and disintegrated as the world shifted around her.

The words swirled around her mind, as they did each time she heard them.

_Both sides of time are revealed to you. What shall you do?_

Maybe this time, she would finally be able to answer that question.


End file.
